UPJOKE
requirementresponsibilitydutyindebtednessmoral obligationdebtjobcommitmentliabilityimperativebondcommitmentsobligedresponsibilitiesnecessity

Obligation Jokes

God calls Satan.

"Hey, I think we misplaced an engineer and he ended up in Hell."

"Yeah, Carl. Been doing a wonderful job. We finally got an AC system up and running and the heaters are fixed. He even designed an auto-poker for the pitchfork teams."

"Send him back here, he belongs in Heaven."

"Y...

Girl, are you a Collateralized Debt Obligation?

Because a lot of rich people are trading you around and a few insiders have told me you're completely toxic.

On a hot Ramadan day...

On a hot Ramadan day, the Bektashi and his friend are caught by the police while eating watermelon in public. Both are taken to the police station. The commissioner asks the friend:

"It's the holy month of Ramadan, aren't you ashamed to eat openly?"

The friend, with a bowed head, can't...

They didn’t remove the right one.

Request: Little brother was just diagnosed with testicular cancer. Lefty is a goner, but as the older brother, I feel the obligation to have some good jokes ready to help him feel better. Unfortunately the title is as good as funny as I get, so please help a brother out. Thanks.
Edit he’s in his ...

75 today, but not as old as this old farmer who's buying land

90 year old farmer goes to the banker for a loan to buy land. The banker has some concerns due to the old codgers age.
"What happens if you die before the loan is paid off?" The banker asks.
"I'll send you a check from heaven, because God would want all my obligations taken care of," The old f...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The new nurse on the scene

A suspected Covid-19 patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse arrives to give him a quick sponge bath.

"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies,...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Japanese contractor at a US company

He works alongside the other staff but he stays kinda reserved and by himself, doesn't mingle, doesn't talk much, apologizes profusely all the time and at the end he stands in front of the others and asks them for a moment of their attention, with a bowed head and deep regret in his voice.

"M...

The funniest thing about this whole situation

Didn't some of the reddit admins promise greater transparency or something? And then they just had this whole situation drop on us without any official explanation or announcement or reasoning.

Sure they might not have an obligation to discuss about a particular employee, but this certainly i...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Day Playing Golf

A husband loved to play golf, but he and his wife were so busy with their jobs and tending to the home and kids that he wasn’t able to go out very often.

After a really busy stretch for both of them, he just had to take a day on the links, so he struck a deal with his wife. He would go on the...

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