Why did Karen press Ctrl+Alt+Delete?

She wanted to see the task manager.

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You kids have it easy with your convenient music streaming services and your smartphones. When we were teenagers, if we wanted to listen to an album by our favourite Australian alt rockers, we had to download it from Napster and put it on a CD ourselves.

We were burning the Midnight Oil.

Why did the Proud Boy check on his sad friend?

To make sure his friend was feeling... alt-right.

Feel free to downvote me to reddit hell...

Now that Matthew McConaughey might be running for governor of Texas people are wondering what his politics are...

I think it’s obvious he’s a member of the Alt Right, Alt Right, Alt Right

In America, it's called Alt Right

In Germany, it's called "This is Why Grandpa Lives in Argentina"

What do you call someone who uses an alt to comment on their posts?

Desperate.

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The alt-right can't be nazis

Their grammar is terrible!

I have three kids named Ctrl, Alt, and Del.

When they mess up, I hit them all at once.

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A woman is at the hospital in a coma.

The doctor steps into the hall to have a talk with the husband.

Doc: I am so sorry sir, but we have run out of options and will need to pull the plug.

Husband: Please don't doc. I love her. Are you sure there is nothing else you can do?

Doc: At this point, we have tried every ...

Why is cocaine the alt-right's favorite drug?

White powder!

What does a gamer say when they alt-tab by mistake?

wwwwwwwwwwwwwww

I don't really understand this Alt Left or Alt Right thing.

It seems as though they're trying to Shift Ctrl until they Del the other.

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What’s the difference between the Alt-Right and Hitler?

Hitler had a girlfriend

What does the alt-right drink?

White powerade

I think my dentist is an alt righter

He thinks the best teeth are 'white and straight'.

The term, "Alt-Left" has been around for decades! Wow, it really takes me back.

If you spend a lot of time on Reddit you may like Ctrl-W as well.

Matthew McConaughey considering a run for Texas Governor.

He's planning to run on an alt-right, alt-right, alt-right platform.

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I want to have 3 kids and name them Ctrl, Alt, and Delete.

That way when they fuck up, I can hit them all at once.

I don’t know what the fuss is about Alt-Right.

Personally, I always use Alt-Left, Ctrl-Left and Shift-Left

People were saying that I was using too mamy alt accounts...

They got down voted to oblivion though

I love Alt + F4

It offers me closure

I don't see why people are getting so heated about alt-left and right

I mean, both keys do the exact same thing

My friend told me he was an Alt-Rightist.

I told him I was an Alt-F4ist.

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Please dont call us grammar nazis

we prefer the term "alt-write"

We have the alt-right, and the new right

When do we get the third right?

Richard Spencer is the Kim Kardashian of the alt-right...

I have no idea why he's famous and I only know his name because some dude pounded him on video.

I've been learning keyboard shortcuts

I have decided to start learning and using keyboard shortcuts, they are really convenient and can actually save you quite a bit of time.

For example:

The Windows key + D will minimize everything and go to your desktop

Alt Tab will switch between applications

Alt Right wi...

Did you hear about the guy who got his face ripped off by a leopard?

He's alt-right now.

Matthew McConaughey was spotted during the Capital Hill protests

When asked to comment what he saw he simply said,

“Alt Right, Alt Right, Alt Right”

There's a winner of a recent dance competition who just got exposed as a huge racist.

She had alt the right moves.

How can you get rid of the Proud Boys?

Just type alt-right delete.

Twitter have just created a keyboard shortcut that mutes all Neo-Conservative posts.

Ctrl + Alt + Right

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What's it called when a member of the alt-right yells at two people on the internet and then posts Nazi propaganda?

Cuck Cuck Goose-Step

I've been wanting to start an alt-rock group

But I just can't seem to find my muse

A lot of people say that alt-right would be good for America.

I'll try it if Ctrl-alt-delete doesn't work.

Trump, Cruz and Graham is sitting in a restaurant and the waiter comes over and asks...

Is everything alt right?

Using high powered gamma rays, creatures on Mars have established total mind control over Donald. And Hillary. And the liberal press. And the Alt-right.

Hey, all I know is what I read on Facebook.

(But it explains everything!)

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My girlfriend sat on my keyboard...

I told her, " You must be sitting on the F5 key, because that ass is refreshing." ...

She said, "No it's Alt +F4". I just got shut down.

A young lady from my office just sent me an email

saying "ithinktherearesomeproblemswithmykeyboardcanyoupleasegivemeanalternative"

Oh boy am I excited, but what does "ternative" mean?

A little girl in charlottesville cries after the violence she's seen, I try to comfort her: "There there...

it's alt right"

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What do you call a grammar nazi?

Alt write

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Four CEOs of beer companies are having a meeting and they decide to get a drink.

The CEO of Budweiser orders a Bud light.
The CEO of Miller orders a Miller Lite.
The CEO of Coors orders a Coors Light.
The CEO of Guinness orders a Coke.

The three CEOS then ask him, why aren't you ordering a Guinness?

He replies: "If you guys aren't drinking beer then n...

There's a new keyboard shortcut in GTA V which if you press it will cause your character to kill minorities.

Alt-right

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I really wouldn't call myself a grammar nazi

I would perfer to be called alt-write

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‘I was at that neo-nazi march today’ “was it any good?”

‘It was alt-right’

Where does Quentin Tarantino hide his Easter eggs?

In his movies



Alt. Punchline, Inglorious Baskets. Hoppy Easter yall!

I Wish I Was a Computer

So I could Alt + F4 my life

Bill Gates dies and goes to hell.

Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you.
This will be your home for all eternity.
You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life.
Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked u...

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The term 'Grammar Nazi' is outdated and offensive...

...we prefer to be called the Alt-Write

Each Man Gets One Wish...

Steve Bannon, Donald Trump, and Justin Trudeau are walking along the path outside the Ottawa Parliament, when they come across a lantern in their path. Upon picking it up, a a cloud of smoke appears, and when it clears, to their amazement, there's a Genie!

The Genie says, "As there are three ...

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In an upcoming film, Matthew McConaughey is going to play a Neo-Nazi

He’s gonna be alt-right, alt-right, alt-right.

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Is this OC? I thought of it in the shower. Help with making it better would be appreciated.

A farmer is eating dinner with his lovely daughter. The local merchants son, known for being honest and trustworthy, walks in and says "sir I'd like to lay with your daughter." The farmer in a rage asks "Why the hell would I let you do that?" To which the merchants son reply's "I was just diagnos...

What is the keyboard shortcut to becoming an idiot who throws temper tantrums like a child?

Alt-right.

Microsoft co-founder Paul Allen died today

Unfortunately ctrl-alt-delete will not bring him back to life.


RIP Paul Allen.

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What's a nazi's favorite button combo on a keyboard?

Alt-right.

I'll see myself out.

What keyboard shortcut can be used to stop recent senseless violence from continuing?

CTRL-ALT-Right

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