Usd Jokes

>!$1.37 USD!<

Roughly 1 USD

A dollar gives you four quarters :-)

A husband got called into a hospital. His wife's just had a really bad car accident... He's pacing nervously in waiting hall expecting the doctor to come out of the OR. Finally the doctor comes out.

- 'How is she, doctor?'
- 'Well, she's alive... and that's good news. But there is some bad... read more

I'd get a Chinese Yuan.

One might say he was definitely not an Elf made millionaire.

The thumb can belong to anyone. Send her head instead.

The steak were high

*An Arab student emails his dad:*

Dear Dad,

Berlin is wonderful, people are nice and I really like it here,
but Dad, I am a bit ashamed to arrive at my college with my pure-gold Ferrari when all my teachers and many fellow students travel by train.

Your son, Nasser.

... read more

"Well neither does the Canadian Mint!"

A jobless man applied for the position of ‘office boy’ at a very big company.

The employer interviewed him, then a test: clean the floor.

“You are hired.” – the employer said. ”Give me your email address, and I’ll send you the application to fill out, as well as when you will start.”... read more

Be a Billionaire and invade Ukraine.



>NK Lukoil PAO
>
>6.96 USD
>
>\-84.96 (-92.43%)past month

A manufacturing plant was in trouble, and nobody knew why. They finally brought in an expert to fix the problem.

The guy basically walks in, inspects the equipment, takes out a chalk piece, marks one unit with an X mark and leaves.

The plant’s owner replaces the unit and viola! everyth... read more

We have your President.

Please send USD 1000M or we sending him back.

They both were determined to prove they had the greatest minds, the greatest technology. In one example, the Americans spent almost a million USD just to invent a no-gravity pen. They put their best minds to work, and came up with putting a small CO2 pressure cartridge into the back of the ink tub... read more

Doctor: Yes, this is a known illness, called alhzimers, unfortunately it has no cure. I’d also like to remind you about the 800 USD that you owe me.

I find:

* 10 banks are giving me easy loans.

* I have won GBP 10000000 and USD 500000 for unknown reasons.

* 10 Job companies have best jobs for me.

* 5 matrimonial sites have most suited matches for me.

* Dr. Batra has claimed that he will cure my hair fall.
... read more

... So he asked his secretary:
"If I give you USD 3 million less 17.5%, how much would you take off?"
Secretary: "Everything Sir! Dress, Underwear, Everything."

However, with the current exchange rate its only about $1.35 USD

Just one really, but be prepared to spend about $8 million USD in "Campaign Donations" if you ever want one to care about somebody else's problem

Three men want make phone call from Hell to remind to their relatives about its harsh conditions Their Nationalities were American, Italian and Iraqi. So they decide to go to Devil who is the boss. So the American made a call and the Devil made him to pay 100 USD, then an Italian made a call and the... read more