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Truck Drivers Jokes

After the COVID-19 pandemic winds down, we should honor truck drivers with a national holiday on October 4th.

A big 10-4, if you will.

Truck driver

So, a truck driver stops at a diner for a cup of coffee, a piece of pie, and a chat with the waitress one evening. Everything’s going fine until a biker gang turns up. They park and come inside, looking for some action. It’s just the truck driver and the waitress, so they start in on the truck drive...

What is the truck drivers favorite part of the movies?

The trailers

I went to the cinema to see a film about truck drivers

It wasn’t for me though. There were too many trailers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do truck drivers and strippers have in common?

They both get paid by the load.

Why do women make terrible truck drivers?

Because you give them a full load, and they take 9 months to deliver.

Why are truck drivers always in accidents?

Because they are semi drivers.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three truck drivers at a bar

Three truck drivers were sitting at a bar. The first two were all bandaged up, looking like they'd been in a train wreck. All three were depressed.

The first guy says: All this was done to me by my wife, and I deserved it. After having sex last night, I forgot and left a couple hundred on the...

Why do truck drivers love the 1st day of June?

Only four more sleeps 'til Christmas

What do truck drivers do when they get too old to have an erection?

Get a new Peterbilt

Why can't truck drivers ever fully retire?

Because they can only semi retire.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A truck drivers wife is standing buck naked staring at herself in the mirror

She says to herself "I'm fat and wrinkly, my skin is old and weather worn, my hair is falling out and I just don't feel beautiful anymore"

She turns to her husband and says 'Honey, I'm fat and wrinkly, my skin is old and weather worn, my hair is falling out and I just don't feel beautiful any...

A warning to all truck drivers and bird lovers

Researchers for the Swansea Authority found over 200 dead crows near M4 recently, and there was concern that they may have died from Avian Flu. A bird pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was definitely *not* Avian Flu. The cause of deat...

Jean-Pierre and his brodeur Claude - de number 1 and number 2 Truck Drivers in all the Proveince de Quebec

Jean-Pierre and his brodeur Claude are de number one and number two truck drivers in all the proveince de Quebec. Dhey have driven trucks for more dhan dhirty years together but dhey hear the money is better in Ontario so dhey try to get a job dhere.

Employer: "So Jean Pierre, I see you and y...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

GEEKS NOT ALLOWED-ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK

This truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers
stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar he sees a big sign on the
door saying "GEEKS NOT ALLOWED-ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!"
He goes in and sits down.

The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, says he smells kind of...

The local bar was so sure that its owner was the strongest man around...

that it offered a standing $1,000 bet that no could beat him.The challenge was that the owner would squeeze a lemon until all the juice ran out into a beer glass, then hand the lemon to the customer. Anyone who could squeeze even one more drop out of the lemon would win the money.Over the years many...

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