UPJOKE
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What do possums and the Detroit Tigers have in common?

Both play dead at home & get killed on the road.

How do Tigers, Elephants, and Lions fly?

On the African plain

Where do tigers go for ice cream?

Carol Baskin Robbins

what led to tigers downfall in golf

He used his wood on too many holes

Five Detroit Tigers fans, Al, Ben, Carl, Dan, and Edgar, are watching a home game for the Tigers. Of course, the Tigers easily lose, and the five fans leave the stadium angrily.

"If those players had played better, we could have won," said Al.

"Don't blame the players, blame the coach," said Ben. "If he had trained the players better, they would have played better."

"Those players couldn't play a decent game if their lives depended on it," said Carl. "But it's...

Why do tigers have stripes?

They don't want to be spotted.

Finally after two weeks of fruitless tracking through the jungle one of our local guides received word that tigers had been spotted just outside a neighbouring village.

Personally I'd been hoping for stripey ones but beggars can't be choosers.

The Ohio and Michigan Institute of Lions and Tigers and Bears.

OH,MI.

My grandpa was telling me about when he used to hunt tigers.

He said, "this one time I was alone in the jungle when out of the bushes, right in front of me, a huge tiger leaped out suddenly and went RRROOOOAAAAAARRRRR!!!!!!! Kid, you won't believe it, I shat myself."

I raised my eyebrows. "You bet I believe it, I'd have shat myself too if that happened...

Out of all the aspects of Tigers game

Nobody ever faulted his driving....

Why are lions more honorable than tigers?

A lion wouldn't cheat on his mate, but a Tiger Wood.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two tigers were strolling through the woods, one behind the other.

The one at the back suddenly paced forward, and gave a quick lick to the other's butthole.

"Hey! Cut it out!!???" It snapped looking back. The tiger at the back immediately apologised and they continued walking.

After a little while this happened again. This time the one in front turne...

2 Tigers At The Bronx Zoo Are Talking

Fred: Hey did you hear what happened to Bob the Tiger?

Larry: Yea, COVID-19. Unbelievable! How could he get a human illness?

Fred: He had a zookeeper for dinner last week.

Larry: That's terrible.

Fred: It gets worse.

Larry: Bob ate a human who gave him Coronavirus,...

Man enters zoo enclosure to feed the tigers...

Succeeds

A hunter was asked what he did for a living, and he responds that he "hunts tigers in Africa."

When it's pointed out that there are no tigers in Africa, he replies "that's because I do my job".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two tigers are walking down the street.

One says to the other:

'It's quiet for a Saturday isn't it?'

A blonde was visiting the zoo and reached the big cat exhibit.



"I wonder what these tigers would say if they could talk," she said to the man next to her.

He replied, "I'm pretty sure they'd say 'We are leopards.'".

How do tigers walk around without being spotted?

By being striped.

I don't know how many tigers there are in South America

But I'm sure there are ocelots

What are the two reactions you should have when you see a tiger in Africa?

Fear, because it's a *fahkin'* tiger!

And Surprise, because there are no tigers in Africa.

What do you call a bunch of tigers on a train?

They're frrrrrreight!

Why do tigers always beat cheetahs at hide-and-seek?

They've never been spotted.

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