Told my blonde girlfriend that the average family in a third world country lives off just £1.25 a day.

She said, "And I thought you were frugal..."

What is Democracy in third world?

Democracy is-
Off the people,
Buy the people,
Far the people

I'm not worried about all this news of a third world war...

... I don't even live in Africa!

The U.K. government have predicted that Scotland could become a “third world country” if they gain independence.

I don’t know if things will improve to that extent but fingers crossed for them.

I feel really bad for kids in third world countries...

They have to go through puberty and their mid-life crisis at the same time.

Phone statistics in third world countries:

Phone statistics in third world countries:


Boy to Boy 00:00:59

Boy to Mom 00:00:50

Boy to Dad 00:00:30

Boy to Girl 01:23:59

Girl to Girl 05:29:59

Girl to Boy Missed call

Husband to Wife 00...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Medical joke...

I work in medicine and I've been getting a lot of emails and messages about counterfeit drugs coming into America. Apparently some medications are being sold in America that were made in backwoods factories and third world countries. The latest message I got from the FDA was to be on the lookout f...

If Earth is the third planet from Sun after Mercury and Venus

Doesn't that make every country a third world country?

I like my coffee like I like my wives,

From a third world country at a reasonable price.

Nice to see America keeping its tradition

Of launching a coup in a third world country.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Quality, Not Quantity

Quality, Not Quantity

The commanding officer at the Russian military academy (the equivalent of a 4-star general in the U.S.) gave a lecture on Potential Problems and Military Strategy. At the end of the lecture, he asked if there were any questions.

An officer stood up and asked, "Wil...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Elevator of youth

A boy and his Father visiting from a third world country were at an American shopping mall. They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and back together again.

The boy asked his Father, "What is this Father?".

The Fat...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bill Clinton was walking along the beach when he stumbledupon a Genie's lamp.

He picked it up and rubbed it and lo-and-behold, a Genie appeared. Bill was amazed and asked if he got three wishes.

The Genie said, "Nope...Due to inflation, constant downswing, low wages in third world countries, and fierce global competition, I can only grant you one wish. So...What'll it...

Read this one online a while back

An engineer dies and goes to hell. At first, he's reluctant to come to terms with where he is.

The devil sees him, and says" Cheer up, hell isn't so bad. I'll prove it, you can have the best room in the house."

The engineer happily accepts and is led to something that looks like it was...

Gimme the worst you got.

Messed up jokes thread. I wanna see how good (or bad) you guys are, so give it all you've got. Dead babies, holocaust, 9/11, third world countries, etc. Let's see what you've got, r/jokes!

Identical Twins

A woman gave birth to identical twin boys.
She and her husband named them Amal and Juan.
However, being a poor family in a third world country, raising two children wasn't feasible, so the couple had to give one child up for adoption, and they chose Amal.
Many years later, the father became...

Fact

I'd like to leave you ladies and gentlemen with this frightening fact: I'm not sure if you're aware of this, but if you took all the money that we in the West spend on food in one week, you could feed the Third World for one year. I'm not sure about you people, but I think we're being overcharged on...

Bush and Powell sit in a bar

The barman approaches them and asks:

'Hello boys, what are you doing here?'

'We're planning the Third World War.'

'Yeah? And what's the plan?'

'We'll kill 30 million Afghans, and a mailman.'

'A mailman? Why do you wanna kill a mailman?'

To which Bush turns t...

An Israeli, a Brit, a Russian, a Vietnamese, and an American are sitting in a restaurant.

An Israeli, a Brit, a Russian, a Vietnamese, and an American are sitting in a restaurant. A reporter comes by and asks, "Excuse me, but can I get your opinion on the recent grain shortage in the third world?" The Brit asks: "What's a 'shortage'?" The Vietnamese asks: "What's 'grain'?" The Russian as...

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