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Sellers Jokes

What did the weed sellers create when they went legal?

A "joint"-stock company.

Treadmill sellers are stiff competitors.

They give you a run for your money.

LPT: Don't Take Home Furniture Sellers

They'll never let you get away with just the one night stand.

ICE-CREAM sellers.....

Make your job sound more important by telling people that you're a 'Walls Treat Trader'!

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3 vacuum sellers are making their way towards a nearby farm

The three walk past a beautiful young girl, the farmers daughter, and go straight for the front door. They knock and the farmer opens up. They ask would he be interested in buying a vacuum. The farmer ponders for a moment and agrees to buy a vacuum, but on one condition. They don't try to flirt with...

From Dario Argento’s Deep Red: Why do Australian boomerang sellers always go bankrupt?

Because their goods are always returned!

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Watch what you buy on ebay...be careful you check out the sellers..I sent $95 for a penis enlarger

...basturds sent me a magnifing glass

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The best salesman in the world

The boy went into the mall to get a job. He told the management that he was the world's best salesman. They gave him a job as a seller, but expected profits from day one.

On Saturday evening the manager came down and asked how many customers he had served today. The boy said he had helped one...

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What do male prostitutes and the actor who played inspector clouseau have in common?

They're both Peter Sellers.

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Not your average dick joke

What does the Pink Panther and a male prostitute have in common?

They’re both Peter Sellers.

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A Woman walks into a sex shop to buy a dildo

"I want that one.." She points to a massive display of dildos on the wall.


The manager picks up one of the best sellers: "This is one of our popular models. It feels very real."


She points back to the wall & says.."No. I want that one..." So, the manager picks up another on...

A wise man is walking through a market with a bag of gold.

As he passes the various sellers, a merchant quickly lights some incense and a beautiful aroma fills the air. “It’s frankincense,” the merchant says. “The best in the land.”

The wise man gets some and is about to leave when the merchant calls out, “But wait ... there’s myrrh!”

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Why are prostitutes so cheap?

Because, they are hole-sellers!

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Did you hear about the bloke who poisoned his wife with a razor blade?

He gave her arse a nick.

Probably doesn't translate well into American English but there you go.

My dad told me this joke over twenty years ago. He said he'd heard Peter Sellers tell it on a street corner.

Don't ask me why Peter Sellers was telling jokes on a street corner. Must...

I plan to start a male escort service.

I'm going to call it Peter Sellers.

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I apologize in advance...

What do you call a consortium of dildo manufacturers?




Peter Sellers

A guy looking in the classified for a used car...

sees a new Corvette listed for $50. Thinking it's a misprint, he decides to go check it out anyway. Arriving at the sellers residence, it's a dream car, not a scratch on it and it runs great.

"Ma'am, I want to buy this car. But the paper said it was only $50, what do you really want fo...

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