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Punching Jokes

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We were having sex the other night and to my surprise my wife started punching me in the face.

I have no idea who let her into my office.

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Jokingly punching someone in the balls isn't funny.

Its a dick move

Why did Will Smith slap Chris instead of punching him?

Everybody knows paper beats rock

A man was arrested for punching a librarian today.

I hope they throw the book at him.

I saw six men kicking and punching my mother-in-law.

My neighbour said ‘Well, are you going to help?’ I said ‘No, six should be enough.’

A man walks into a bar and there's a long line of people punching each other.

That's the punchline.

A sports store is showing off their new punching bags by having a contest to see who can hit them the hardest.

While everyone is waiting for their turn, St. Peter turns to a drunk and says, "I think I'm in the wrong joke."

The drunk replies, "Nope. Just the wrong punch line."

(OC) What do you call Helen Keller punching someone?

Senseless violence.

We all know that punching bag arcade game where you try to punch the bag the hardest.

So, I was standing in line to take my turn at the game. When I suddenly realized what a douche I am, putting myself in the punchline of my own joke.

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Little Bobby was running through the woods

Little Bobby was running through the woods behind his house when the urge to go #2 struck. Bobby did his business behind a tree and carried on his way. The next day, Bobby was out behind his house again when he saw a swarm of flies circling yesterday's droppings. Intrigued, Bobby dropped his pants a...

A man jumps into a lion's cage to save a 5 year old boy by punching the lion in the nose

Soon, reporters are on the scene.

"Why don't you tell us a bit more about yourself"

"Well, I'm currently a stockbroker, but I got out of the Army only two years ago"

"What do you do for fun"

"I'm an avid fisherman, and I teach rifle safety classes for the NRA"

"Who...

Surfer saves shark by punching wife in New South Wales.

Beg your pardon. Let me read that again...

I’m all for punching not-sees.

Blind people weaken the race.

What’s the difference between putting a microchip in a snail and punching a grasshopper in the face?

One is bugging a slug.
The other is slugging a bug

A man emptied a punching bag of its content and filled it with Guinness books.

He then proceded to beat all records.

How does a muslim buy a punching bag?

Gets married

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I wear a mask and run around punching women in their breasts.

It’s my secret I dent titties.

You won't go to prison for punching a tortilla...

But you might get a wrap on the knuckles.

Punching bag is hitting me back, Any advice?

Edit: Never-mind we got a divorce

I once saw a group of dudes punching an old man, so I decided to help

He never stood a chance against us

My career as a street fighter didn't last very long...

I broke my hand punching a curb.

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I'm bad at two things: telling jokes, and not getting angry while waiting in queue at orgies...

But I keep punching up the fuck line.

What's the best thing about punching twenty one years olds?

There's twenty of them.

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