Why did the vampire get nervous during the poker game?

His opponent had just raised the stakes.

Poker game

I was playing poker with my friends Robin and Drake and some of their distant cousins.

There was this one chick who won almost every hand.

I can't be sure but I suspect fowl play.

When does a strip poker game start getting good?

When somebody's got a big pair showin'.

A man came home from a poker game...

A man came home from a poker game late one night and found his hideous harpy of a wife waiting for him with a rolling pin. "Where the hell have you been?" she asked.
"You'll have to pack all your things, dear," he ad-libbed. "I've just lost you in a card game." "How did you manage to do that?" "I...

Why does Queen Elizabeth’s toilet do so well in poker games?

Because it’s got a royal flush.

Jerry Seinfeld at a Poker game:

“What’s the deal?”

Which deck of cards does Professor Oak use for his poker games?

His poker decks.

Entering a friend's home for his weekly poker game, Slick is amazed to see a dog sitting at the table.

He's even more surprised when the dog wins the first hand with a full house, and takes the second with a royal flush.
"This is unreal," Slick says after the dog wins the next two hands. "He's got to be only dog in the world that can play like that."
"Aw, he's not so great," says the host. "The...

Did you hear about the weekly poker game with Vasco da Gama, Christopher Columbus, Leif Erikson, and Francisco Pizarro?

They can never seem to beat the Straights of Magellan.

Why was the poker game at the zoo cancelled?

Some believed that there was a cheetah among them.

Did u hear about the leper poker game?

everyone threw their hands in

What did one bird say to the other bird when he played five aces in a poker game?

Cheat, cheat, cheat.

Decided to eat some chips yesterday

Apparently that's "super weird" and "completely inappropriate at a poker game"

A holy man was feeling distraught one morning, so he sat alone in his church praying to God for guidance...[long]

The Good Reverend had been giving into indulgence far too often lately; drinking wine, his Tuesday night Poker games, and sneaking peeks at those unmentionable places on the Interwebs.

It had started innocently enough, but the priest was getting carried away and the guilt was finally getting ...

The Italian Poker Club

Six retired Italian fellows were playing poker in the condo clubhouse when Guido loses $1,000 on a single hand, clutches his chest, and drops dead at the table.

Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five continue playing, but standing up.

At the end of the game, Giovanni ...

A family got a new Lie Detector Machine

The Machine Would buzz whenever a lie was told, so the Father decided to test it out at Dinner.
The father asked,

"What did you do with your lunch money today at school,son?"

" I just bought lunch"

The Machine buzzed, and the kid starting sweating as the Mom and Dad looked a...

Two old men where sitting at the chess table playing

When one of them moved the queen and said "Check"

"What?"

"Check"

"What do you want me to check?"

"No, I'll pick up the check."

"Did you say you needed to get your hearing checked?"

"Sure, let's play checkers!"



And that's how the poker game tu...

A Guy Gets Home From Playing Poker....

...and says to his wife, "Pack your bags. I just lost you to Frank in a Poker game."

She indignantly exclaims, "How could you do such a thing?"

"It wasn't easy," he replied. "I had to fold a full house."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Randolph the Bow-Legged Cowboy

You know George Armstrong Custer
And Frank James and Zorro,
Buffalo Billy, Red Ryder, and Tonto
But do you recall
The most famous cowboy of all?

Randolph, the bow-legged cowboy
Had a very shiny gun
And if you ever saw it
You would drop your pants and run

All of th...

A cop pulls over a car during a traffic check

A cop pulls over a car during a traffic check and as he's asking the driver for his credentials, he spots three penguins sitting in the backseat.

"Sir, what are you doing with three penguins in your car?" asked the cop.

"That's a funny story." answered the man, "I won these off of a fr...

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