UPJOKE
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Photographs Jokes

Q. Why were photographs so depressing before digital cameras were invented?

A. Because they spent too much time processing the negatives.

Girls hate it when I suddenly send them photographs of parasites

Turns out, no one wants unsolicited tick pics

A photographer from a well known international magazine was assigned to cover the fires at Yellowstone National Park.

When the photographer arrived, he realize that the smoke was so thick, it would seriously impede or make it impossible for him to photograph anything at ground level.

He requested permission to hire a plane and take photos from the air.

Arriving at the airport, he saw a plane warming ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Somebody told my g/f it was sexy to bite her lip posing for photographs....

I still haven't found the courage to tell her its the bottom lip you bite......





(you just tried to bite your upper lip)

Students at a high school in Georgia were suspended for posting photographs of their crowded hallways.

The administration was worried about the wrong thing going viral.

A quick and easy way to make money is to sell photographs of salmon dressed up in tuxedoes.

It’s like shooting fish in apparel.

Why don't racist people take photographs in old cameras?

'Cause they appear in black and white.

What's the difference between young girls and photographs?

After putting them in a dark room, you have to wait for the photograph to fully develop.

My neighbors, the Razzis, have more family photographs hanging from their wall than anyone I know.

Thanks to their Dad.

Papa Razzi.

An American photographer on vacation.

An American photographer on vacation was inside Westminster Abbey taking photographs when he noticed a golden telephone mounted on the wall with a sign that read '£10,000 per call'.

The American, being intrigued, asked a priest who was strolling by what the telephone was used for.

The ...

A soldier serving overseas far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote to break off their engagement and ask for her photograph back.

He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together, and sent them back with a note saying, “I regret that I cannot remember which one you are.

Please keep your photo and return the others.”

What do you call someone who photographs fish?

A school shooter

I used to work in a darkroom developing photographs...

but I quit because there was too much negativity.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Horse Joke (long)

So there are two racehorses.

A young racehorse and an old racehorse.

The young racehorse is about to run his first race and the old racehorse is undefeated going into his last race.

The old racehorse goes over to the young racehorse and says "Hey, you're a really fast runner. Y...

A 3D Artist was commissioned to make a virtual replica of Rio De Janeiro, Brazil...

He took a look at photographs, saw that giant Jesus statue, and exclaimed, "Wow; what amateurs! They didn't even texture him, and rendered him in T-pose!"

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