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Nerds Jokes

Why do a lot of math nerds wear glasses?

It helps with division.
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What do nerds and racists have in common?

They both aspire to be wizards.
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Where do Soviet nerds gather?

At Commie-Con.
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Language nerds

2 polyglots meet in a bar:

\- Hey, what's up, how's going these days?

\- Same old, just polishing my Finnish... and you?

\- You know me, still trying to finish my Polish.
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Open Season on Nerds

This truck driver was driving through the Silicon Valley. He decides he needs a cup of coffee so he pulls into this truck stop. As he goes in the door he sees a sign that says "No Nerds will be served." He sits down at the bar, and the bartender comes over to him. The truck driver says, "I'll have a...

What is a group of nerds called?

A Google.
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Joke for economics nerds

A physicist and an economist are invited to a classroom to make a presentation to get the children interested in their field of study. The physicist goes first.

He produces a ball and announces, “I will time this ball falling to the ground and, without looking at the stopwatch, tell you how l...
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Nerds

A truck driver hauling a tractor-trailer load of computers stops for a beer. As he approaches the bar he sees a big sign on the door saying "Nerds Not Allowed - Enter At Your Own Risk!" He goes in and sits down.

The bartender comes over to him, sniffs, says, "You smell kind of nerdy. What do...

what's a nerds favourite dessert?

Raspberry pi
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What do you call adult nightclubs for nerds?

Comic strips.
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Do you come from a family of math nerds?

If you do, then you have square roots!
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Attention Nerds!

It would be so much easier if humans came with an error message just like computers do.
Imagine sitting in a restaurant and failing miserably at flirting with the waitress.
"Warning! Error establishing connection with the Server"
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

**INFINITY WAR SPOILERS**

Ok now that all the nerds are gone, there's a party going on at my place this Saturday. hmu if you're interested.

LinkedIn is like reverse dating site for IT nerds

They get a lot of messages from girls

But ignore most of them
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Why are D&D nerds better in bed?

Because they always take initiative in the roleplay.
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What do you call a restaurant that predominantly uses garlic as an ingredient that caters to literary nerds?

Allicin Wonderland
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Why don't nerds read the newspaper?

Because they already Reddit.
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My friend wrote his dissertation on nerds who love palindromes

He is now Dr. Awkward.
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Two computer nerds start arguing about if they have to pronounce it gif or jif.

The argument gets extremely heated and it goes on for hours.

In the end they just decide to have the sandwich with just the jelly.
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Why is it hard to make friends with computer nerds?

They are very click-y
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What do nerds usually say during thanksgiving?

“(√-1)/8”
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Two engineering nerds were walking across their college campus.

One of them had a bike:

Nerd 1: Where did you get that bike, man; it looks pretty well made.

Nerd 2: Yesterday I saw a beautiful woman riding this bike in the park, and I winked at her. She came over, threw the bike down, took off her clothes, and said to me 'take what you want'.
...
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Did you hear about that cologne made for nerds?

They call it “Elon’s Musk”
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One for the Grammar Nerds (and kids)

Knock Knock

Who's there?

To.

To who?

To *whom.*
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What company makes Nerds?

Your mom.
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What do nerds and Creationists have in common?

They're offended by The Big Bang Theory.
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If grammar nerds had a convention...

...it would be called Lexicon.
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Do you want to know what I realized about Quiet Kids that are also Science Nerds?

They only speak periodically.
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What do nerds eat for breakfast?

Terabytes
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This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do nerds relieve their sexual frustration?

They maths debate.

If nerds play RPGs, what do Geeks play?

RBGs.
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Music history nerds- What do Wagner’s musical works and his debts have in common?

They both never resolve.




Yes I know this is bad but we’re studying Wagner and the class/professor appreciated it. Carry on with your day.
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Jokes that nerds tell

I would tell you a NTP joke, but I don't have the time.

Got any more
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Why are so many online nerds voting far-right?

They are terrible at socializing.
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Ten Science Jokes for Nerds

* I’m reading a great book on anti-gravity. I can’t put it down.

* I have a new theory on inertia but it doesn’t seem to be gaining momentum.

* Why can’t atheists solve exponential equations? Because they don’t believe in higher powers.

* Schrodinger’s cat walks into a bar. And ...
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Joke for chemistry nerds ;)

Argon walks into a bar and the bartender says:

-We don't serve noble gases here!

Argon doesn't react.
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What do you call two nerds dry humping on the couch?

Science friction.
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