UPJOKE
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How do You Drown a Hipster?

Throw him into the mainstream.

Why aren't gluten free people mainstream?

The go against the grain.

Jokes about necrophilia and bestiality are pretty mainstream

Telling them is like beating off a dead horse

What does mainstream media and viral video have in common?

It's all staged.

What do you call an elephant that’s no longer mainstream?

Ir-elephant

I dont like the fact that the Thailand cave boys have become all famous and mainstream.

I preferred them when they were more Underground

What is a mainstream media award for accurate, fair and even-handed journalism called?

A pink slip.

I'm writing a musical about a rag-tag team of Breitbart columnists standing up to the mainstream media elites.

It's called Fake Newsies.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do you kill a hippie?

Drown him in the mainstream

Edit: i meant to say hipster! I f up guys haha!

I use to tell good jokes, now i just punch up the fuck line

Where do you drown a hippie?

In the mainstream (I know it was terrible)

How do you drowned a hipster?

Throw them in the mainstream.

I threw a hipster into the Mississippi...

Guess whose mainstream now?

Why was the hipster fish late to the party?

Because he didn’t take the mainstream.

Why did the hipsters die of dehydration?

They stayed away from the mainstream.

Hipster Jokes!

Why did the hipster float down the tributary?

Because the river was too mainstream.


How many hipsters does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Some obscure number you've never heard of.


Why did the hipster burn his mouth when he ate pizza?

Because he ate it be...

I like to think of terrible pickup lines. Here's my most recent one.

"Hey girl, are you a mainstream, late 90's, early 2000's heavy metal band with a lisp?

Becauthe I'm 'Down with the Thickneth."

Looks her up and down.

some hipster jokes

Q: What do you call a hipster with a speech
impediment?
A: Mumblr. Q: Why do hipsters love ice?
A: Because ice was water before it was cool. Q: Why are all the ugly chicks hipsters?
A: Because beauty is just too Mainstream!Q: How many hipsters does it take to screw in a
lightbulb?
...

In March 2005, a hipster, rabbi and a priest were walking alongside a river.

"I get 1000 people for every congregation I do" said the Rabbi trying to put forth his importance.

"Well, that's nothing. I get 5000 people for mass every sunday" said the priest, looking extremely smug.

They both looked at the hipster, who didn't seem to give a f*ck about these achie...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Neutral

A woman goes shoe shopping and discovers that all of the mainstream brands are out of stock. She yells and complains to the manager until a customer throws an orange at her.

At this, the woman miraculously calms down and immediately leaves the store. Dumbfounded, the manager asks the custome...

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