UPJOKE
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A mousse

This Scottish bloke goes on a skiing holiday to Canada.
After a hard day on the slopes he retires to a bar at the bottom of the mountain.
After about five or six whiskeys, he looks up and notices a stuffed animal with antlers on the wall.
He asks the barman, "What the hell is that?"
The...

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What magic spell does Harry Potter use when he get diarrhoea from a chocolate mousse?

Expelli-arse-mousse

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Three mice are sitting in a bar…

bragging about how tough they are. First mouse says, “Listen mice, I’m so tough, I bench press the bar on a rat trap every morning.” Second mousse sneers, “Ha! I put rat poison in my cereal, and eat two bowls for breakfast every morning!” The third mouse finishes his beer, belches, and says, “Pussi...

At a restaurant...

ME: I'll have the mouse, please.

WAITER: That's mousse, sir.

ME: Never mind then, that would be way too much food

What is a hippo's favourite dessert?

Hippopota-mousse

Things mothers said

THOMAS EDISON'S MOTHER:
"Of course I'm proud that you invented the electric light bulb. Now, turn it off and get to bed!"


ABRAHAM LINCOLN'S MOTHER:
"Again with the stovepipe hat? Can't you just wear a baseball cap like the other kids?"


ALBERT EINSTEIN'S MOTH...

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