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Kinks Jokes

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My wife's friends were trying to get me to talk about our kinks

Unfortunately for them, I don't piss and tell.

A bunch of different people are talking about their kinks and fetishes...

... The guy with a somnophilia kink looks to another guy and asks him for his thoughts on CNC. The guy who likes watersports turns to him and says, "Nah, not my cup of pee."

People shouldn't be shamed for their kinks. Me, I get really turned on when someone smells like musty sweat and coal.

But I always get called a monster when I admit to being attracted to miners.

My friend was wondering if he should explore his kinks about masochism and boxing

I said knock yourself out.

It looks like you are all tired of seeing me post about my kinks of sadism, zoophilia and necrophilia

I feel like I am just flogging a dead horse.

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A story about kinks and boobs

I started dating this girl with a really weird fetish -- she's got a very nice pair of knockers, and she loves having it smacked loudly. She really gets off from the pain and from the really loud POP sound that the slap of skin-on-skin can make. Recently, she's been getting more kinky about it, and ...

I can't believe that my joke about The Who and The Kinks wasn't approved.

I've obviously upset the mods.

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At first I found my girlfriend's kinks exciting but now they're starting to become a bit of a pain in the arse.

Bloody Peggy.

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My wife is a champ for putting up with my sexual kinks

She takes it on the chin

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When I have enough saved up, I'm going to convert my cellar into a sex dungeon to really indulge my freaky kinks.

But for now it's just going to be debasement.

Blacksmith: "I'm almost done with this sword, I just need to work out the kinks."

Sword: "Hit me more!"

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My sexbot is nearly complete

I just need to work in a few kinks!


…Later, when they find my dead body:

"Seems like this robot… turned on its creator!"

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I've invented the ultimate sex toy, the Fetish-o-matic 3000!

Not quite ready for mass production though, still working out the kinks.

What's the difference between a gardener and a pimp?

A gardener doesn't want his hose to have kinks.

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Therapist: Have you gotten over your fetish of being starched, pressed, and folded?

Me: We’re still ironing out the kinks

I always wait a couple of weeks after a new massage parlor opens before letting them touch me.

Gotta let them work the kinks out.

Escorts

Every escort I met had a different weired fetish, something I found deeply annoying.

Mainly because I trained as plumber and always hated getting the kinks out of the hose.

I have been inventing a new fetish, however...

I still haven't worked out the **Kinks**!

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Why was the hose at the sex dungeon no good?

It had too many kinks

I created a fetish exercise program, but I don’t know how to end it.

We are still working out the kinks.

I have this great joke about construction

I'm still working on it

Got to hammer out a few kinks

Make sure to nail the delivery

I just don't want to screw it up

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I'm afraid our fetish-friendly sex robot won't be ready on time.

We haven't worked out all the kinks yet.

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Me and my girlfriend are still trying to figure out how to have sex with all of our weird fetishes.

It's coming along but we're still trying to work out the kinks.

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i'm working on a porn filtering app that would show only vanilla porn...

but I can't work out the kinks

Why is it best to visit your chiropractor for your fetishes?

Because they will help you work out your kinks.

I’ve opened up a gym helping ageing rock bands get back into shape. It’s going okay so far...

Just working out the Kinks.

I want to open a gym for people with fetishes.

It's a great idea in theory, but I'm still trying to work out the kinks.

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Sex robots will soon be common place....

They just need to work out all the kinks.

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I was hangin' with a couple of buddies

We got really toasted & for some reason we got on the subject of porn. Weird porn. Incest porn, furry porn. Just some kinks. One of my buds pulls up a weird incest/furry porn that was really unwatchable for me. We scrolled through some thumbnails and I said "stop, go back, that one." He clicked ...

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Why is it detrimental to have a robot with repressed sexual interests?

It has some kinks to work out.

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