UPJOKE
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A lawyer calls up a plumber to come out to his house...

The plumber takes a look and says, OK, I can fix it today, and it will be $800.

The lawyer raises an eyebrow and asks, how long will it take? The plumber responds, "well, I need about an hour round trip to the supply house for a part, and then it should take me about an hour for the repair"<...

Do vegans get paid hourly or celery?

That's it. That was the joke. No witty punchline or anything like that. Sorry.

What was U2's lawyer's hourly rate?

Nothing, he was pro-Bono

I needed an emergency tire change. I asked what the hourly rate was. I was relieved when they said itโ€™s a...

...Flat Fee.

After the hourly check in with my friend in North Korea he said...

Who are you? Stop calling me!

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