This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

To all my circumsized homies

Where da hood at?

My teacher told me to hand over my essay

But I don't snitch on my homies

Why are they called homies?

Because the homie’s where the heart is.

Writing a book about a friend that lives with otters by the water

Going to call it "homies otter sea"

me: will this car fit 5 people?

**salesman:** yeah, without any problems.

**me:** damn! my homies have lots of those

Words of encouragement for all my paranoid homies out there

*Whispering* you are not alone

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Of Ted

Me, Ted and the rest of the homies would meet every week no matter what and game at each other's house.

However as the weeks passed by, Ted became less excited about these sessions. It turned out that he had gotten himself hooked to smoking. It got so bad to the point whereby he even made ex...

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Two homies from Oakland decide to go on a road trip, without a destination...

As Tyrrell is loading the trunk with booze, weed, and all sorts of ill shit, Jerome is loading himself up with all sorts of bling. They jump in the low riding Cutlass and hit the road.

A few days of mindless driving goes by, Tyrrell asks Jerome: "Ay bruh, where we at?" Jerome responds: "Sheee...

Why do the Mexican homies on the States always have one shoe lace untied?

Because in the sole of their shoes it says Taiwan

Why do the homies call their friend Paragraph?

Because he's too short to be an essay

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If Herodotus was a vlogger

It's ya boi Herodotus back atch ya with another travlog!

So, I was in Delphi, and man, they be real mad with em Spartans.

Not taking sides, just my 2 Drachmae. Maybe my Athenian homies should've toned down their backstabbing a little bit, so that those Spartan hunks didn't have to canc...

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3 Nuns [Long]

Three nuns were kicking around the convent one day, doing nun things such as praising the lord and disapproving of pop music when one nun said

"RIGHT. I'm sick of being a nun, I want to quit" the other two nuns agreed, being a nun is rubbish, and skipped off singing to Mother Superiors offic...

A slug has died after his girlfriend left him for a larger snail...

His homies said he was salty.

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