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Rest Home Jokes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

First Day at the Rest Home

This is one of my favorite jokes. Also, my first post on Reddit. Be gentle:

An old man is checking into a rest home with his son. The old man is apprehensive about the place, but the son is reassuring.
"Don't worry, Dad," says the son. "You'll like it here." They finish unpacking and the s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So three elderly men at a rest home are conversing about their age...

The first man says, "When I get up at 6:00 AM, it takes me a half hour to pee."

Second man says, "You're lucky. When I get up at 7:00 AM, it takes me a straight hour to take my morning poop."

Third man says, "I piss like a racehorse at 6:00 and crap like a goose at 7:00."

"Then ...

There is a doctor who works with geriatric patients at a rest home.

The first patient comes in and the doctor asks "what's 3 times 3?" The patient responds, "810,958." The doctor jots this down and goes on to the next patient. "What's 3 times 3?" He asks. The second patient replies with "Tuesday." The doctor jots this down and moves on to the 3rd patient. He asks hi...

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