Why is coronavirus like Groundhog Day? (The actual day, not the film)

If you stick your head outside and encounter another person, you get 6 more weeks of quarantine.

I love February because it contains two of my favorite annual events

Groundhog Day, and the State of the Union Address.

One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a notoriously unreliable mammal for prognostication with no basis in reality. The other involves a groundhog.

What did the groundhog's trainer tell him before the Olympics?

Gopher gold.

Here we see the majestic Woodchuck, also known as a Groundhog which begs the question

How much ground would a ground hog hog if a ground hog could hog ground?

A groundhog tried to cross a well by burrowing under it.

It didn't go over well.

Can't believe the film Groundhog Day came out 26 years ago....

It feels like yesterday.

What did the French groundhog see on February 2nd?

His chateau

Has anyone played that weird Mexican carnival game where groundhogs pop out of holes and you have to smear them with avocado?

I really suck at Guac-a-mole.

Does anyone know any good groundhog day jokes?

Because I keep hearing the same ones over and over...

what animal takes up the most land?

a groundhog.

Groundhog Day is a classic.

It sure has great replay value.

What's a redditor's favorite movie?

Groundhog Day.

Girl, your parents must have been groundhogs...

Because when I saw your shadow it was spring in my pants.

Americans tend to think us Aussies are all dumb...

But atleast we get our weather information from meteorologists and not groundhogs.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So this golfer goes to confession and tells the priest, "Forgive me father for I have sinned."

The priest says, "Tell me your transgressions, my son."

"Well," the guy says, "I was on the 5th hole last week and I hate to say it but I cursed."

"What happened, my son?" the priest asks.

"So I teed it up and I hit the ball about 40 yards past the hole..."

"And you swore...

Stop trying to predict the next Arab Spring

Just pencil it in six weeks after Arab Groundhog Day.

What do you call a pig with no legs?

Ground Hog! Happy Groundhog's Day!

What do you call a male pig with no legs and delusions of being a weather forecaster?

Groundhog

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Today needs to be Lobster or steak day...

Because this groundhog tastes like crap!

What's the American settler's spirit animal?

The groundhog.

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