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Why is coronavirus like Groundhog Day? (The actual day, not the film)

If you stick your head outside and encounter another person, you get 6 more weeks of quarantine.

I love February because it contains two of my favorite annual events

Groundhog Day, and the State of the Union Address.

One involves a meaningless ritual in which we look to a notoriously unreliable mammal for prognostication with no basis in reality. The other involves a groundhog.

Here we see the majestic Woodchuck, also known as a Groundhog which begs the question

How much ground would a ground hog hog if a ground hog could hog ground?

What did the French groundhog see on February 2nd?

His chateau

What did the groundhog's trainer tell him before the Olympics?

Gopher gold.

Has anyone played that weird Mexican carnival game where groundhogs pop out of holes and you have to smear them with avocado?

I really suck at Guac-a-mole.

It's Groundhog Day!

Celebrate by reposting your favorite joke!

Just like every other day!

Does anyone know any good groundhog day jokes?

Because I keep hearing the same ones over and over...

Have you ever eaten groundhog?

How about sausages? That's ground hog.

what animal takes up the most land?

a groundhog.

I just watched groundhog day for the first time but I don't know how I feel about it.

The story felt very repetitive

Can't believe the film Groundhog Day came out 26 years ago....

It feels like yesterday.

Living beside a groundhog means you get one prediction every morning.

Yesterday I learned that my tomatoes will be ripe in 6 weeks.

Today I learned that my dementia is onset and early.

What does it mean when a groundhog sees a maple leaf on feb. 02?

...six more weeks of bad hockey!

Girl, your parents must have been groundhogs...

Because when I saw your shadow it was spring in my pants.

Americans tend to think us Aussies are all dumb...

But atleast we get our weather information from meteorologists and not groundhogs.

What do you call a pig with no legs?

Ground Hog! Happy Groundhog's Day!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So this golfer goes to confession and tells the priest, "Forgive me father for I have sinned."

The priest says, "Tell me your transgressions, my son."

"Well," the guy says, "I was on the 5th hole last week and I hate to say it but I cursed."

"What happened, my son?" the priest asks.

"So I teed it up and I hit the ball about 40 yards past the hole..."

"And you swore...

What do you call a male pig with no legs and delusions of being a weather forecaster?


This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Today needs to be Lobster or steak day...

Because this groundhog tastes like crap!

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