UPJOKE
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What's an easy way to tell if you have a blown head gasket?

Just look for lipstick marks on your crank shaft.

I'm going to dress up as a Subaru head gasket for Halloween.

There's a really good chance I'll get blown.

A blown gasket.

A penguin is driving in the hot Arizona desert when smoke starts to bellow out from underneath the hood. He just so happens so see a service station so pulls in. He walks up to the attendant.

"Sir. Would you mind looking at my car?"

"No not at all, give me about five or ten minutes and...

Dear redditors, I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision.

I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs...phone rings, but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently, although when I ask their names she always says, "Just some friends from work, you don't know them."r&...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two men are talking at a job placement office

about how difficult it is to get a job when you have a criminal record. The first guy says, "Well, it's all about putting a positive spin on it. Take me for example, I was arrested for trying to rob the same convenience store 6 times. So I tell people that I'm persistent, tenacious, and refuse to gi...

There's this penguin...

There's this penguin, driving through the South, the Deep South... late August. The hot months. "Ew! But it sure is hot!" the penguin lisped from behind the wheel of his choking jalopy.

Suddenly! The jalopy fails the penguin and he has to push it down a bumpy road to the next small town. He g...

Credit to /u/Poem_for_your_sprog

He sat and sighed beside the road -

His engine's gasket blown.

His car was old and cold and towed.

The man was left alone.

-

'I need to find a place to stay

Until it's fixed,' he spoke -

But as he rose to walk away

Arrived a band of folk.
...

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