My friend wouldn’t stop talking about file compression

So I told him to “*zip it*”

Wrote a free file compression program.

I made zip.

So, Richard Feynman applies for a job...

Interviewer: Now comes the part of the interview where we ask a question to test your creative thinking ability. Don’t think too hard about it, just apply everyday common sense, and describe your reasoning process.

Here’s the question: Why are manhole covers round?

Feynman: They’re not...

What's a dinosaur's favorite form of compression?

RAR files.

What is a caveman's favourite audio compression algorithm?

OGG

What is 'gr8'

The Great Compression

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man passes out while swimming in a river.

A group of people surround the riverbank where the young man was floating.

Then, a cocky medical student pushes through the crowd, dives into the river and pulls the man half out.

He then starts performing CPR on the man, with every chest compression water comes out of the man's mouth....

My wife broke her foot yesterday...

The doctor recommended Rest, Ice, Compression & Elevation.

When I asked my wife how bad the pain was on a scale of 1-10, she replied:

Broken foot: 10/10

Broken foot with RICE: 5/10

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I was 10

Around age 10 my dad got me one of those little badass compound bow beginner kits. Of course, the first month I went around our land sticking arrows in anything that could get stuck by an arrow. Did you know that a 1955 40 horse Farmall tractor tire will take 6 rounds before it goes down? Tough sumb...

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