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Fundraiser Jokes

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This is a joke my dad told me a long time ago. I hope I don't offend anyone.

A young man was inspired to help out with his church's fundraiser. He asked the preacher if he could participate. The preacher, knowing the young man had a bad stutter, only gave him 3 bibles to sell.

The following day the young man returned asking for more. The preacher gave him 5. The follo...

Dave Grohl’s kid: Dad, these cakes you made for the school fundraiser are great, but we’re one short.

Dave Grohl: I’VE GOT ANOTHER CONFECTION TO MAKE!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I’m holding a fundraiser on Friday for people who have trouble reaching orgasm….

If you can’t come, let me know.

Church Fundraiser

A preist wanted to raise money for his church and on being told that there was a fortune in horse racing, decided to purchase a horse and enter it in the races. However, at the local auction, the going price for horses was so high that he ended up buying a donkey instead. He figured that since he ha...

My newest girlfriend broke up with me after we lost a one legged race fundraiser.

She says we got off on the wrong foot.

I'm Starting a Fundraiser to Help Restore Sight to Seniors with Degenerative Eye Problems.

Please Upvote for visibility.

Gary Johnson is at a fundraiser

Gary Johnson is at a fundraiser for the upcoming election. Worn out from being in the spotlight, he propositions a hooker and heads to a hotel room. Once inside, they rip their clothes off and start making out. She throws him on the bed and seductively asks "Do you enjoy felacio?" He looks at her wi...

Hello people of reddit. We have started a fundraiser for abused children. If only we can raise 500 dollars,

We can buy their silence.....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I'm organising a fundraiser concert for those who are unable to reach full orgasm

If you can't come, let me know.

My bank account was hacked!!!

The hacker was so disappointed, he started a fundraiser for me.

A man rode a bicycle from Utsjoki to Helsinki to raise money for a fundraiser

When a news team came along to interview, all he said was "it was a fun trip from start to Finnish"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Hillary Clinton was invited to address a major gathering of the American Indian Nation two weeks ago in upstate New York.

She spoke for almost an hour about her plans for increasing every Native American’s present standard of living. She referred to her time as a U.S. Senator and how she had voted for every Native American issue that came to the floor of the Senate.

 

Although Hillary was vague a...

Headline: Dressy Nessi pressie gets messy Messi blessy.

Press Release:
The annual Loch Ness Foundation's black-tie fundraiser and press conference was ruined when the priest saying an opening prayer spilled coffee on an Argentinian soccer star's tuxedo.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just started volunteering at the library. We're putting on a fundraiser where we gather porn stars from all over the country and have them read as many books as they can in 60min to raise money for kids with jaundice

We're calling it the Golden SHH Hour.

(OC)

The local United Way office never got a donation from the town's most successful lawyer.

The local United Way office realized it had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer.

A fundraiser called him up and said, "Sir, our research shows that you have an income of over $600,000, but you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to you...

So my family and I go past a nursing home...

There are balloons on the sign. My wife says "maybe someone had a birthday", my daughter says "maybe it's for a fundraiser", and then my son says "maybe someone they didn't like died and they are celebrating"

A lady finds out what a reference said about to her potential employer and is upset by it.

She calls her friend and asks him: "Why did you say I was a racist?!"

The friend is confused and asks "what are you talking about?"

The lady tells him, "You know how I listed you as a reference for that job in publishing? Because I always wanted to work in publishing? Well, not alway...

The story of Arthur Nelson

Arthur Nelson is one of the least known pioneers of professional wrestling. He invented many of the submission holds that we still see today, and two of them bear his name: the half Nelson and the full Nelson. According to numerous sources, he also created many of the variations of the chokehold....

So a man is on a cruise...

That's sponsored by the Democratic party for a fundraiser. He's walking around enjoying his time when he comes across a group of people watching a game of limbo.
He sees that the crowd is really enjoying watching the game, so he hops in.
When it's his turn to go under, he ducks waaayy under ...

r/jokes Rich Lawyer on a plane next to philanthropist

Rich lawyer is sitting in first class next to the head of a major charity organization.

Head of said charity takes the opportunity to introduce himself and the cause, but lawyer isn’t interested in giving. No surprise. He’s notoriously rich and not very friendly.

Finally, charity dire...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Costume party in Boston

So a charitable organization in Boston throws a costume party fundraiser. The theme of the party is Emotions, and the partygoers are supposed to dress like an emotion.

So at about midnight, a man stumbles up to the door in a wedding gown. He's stopped by the door man.

"Da fucka you do...

I have never seen my all time favorite joke here, so I will submit relatively original content, enjoy!

There was a newspaper in a very small Midwestern farming town, comes out once a week with local news like the new library books, or the preachers sermon, and school fundraisers. One day the editor calls the reporter in and says, "I don't know what to do about the next issue. There isn't a damn thin...

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