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So I found out I was sexually attracted to electrical currents

Yeah, shocking

A guy goes into a store and asks if they sell Potato Clocks. The assistant says “Sorry sir, we don’t. We have battery clocks, electrical clocks, wind up clocks. In fact I’ve never heard of a potato clock.” The man says...

“Neither have I, but I start my new job at nine tomorrow and my wife said I should get a potato clock.”

Man in a helicopter

A helicopter was flying around above Seattle when an electrical malfunction disabled all of the aircraft's electronic navigation and communications equipment.

Due to the clouds and haze, the pilot could not determine the helicopter's position. The pilot saw a tall building, flew toward it, ci...

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and an architect are sitting around, talking

They get onto the topic of how amazing the human body is. The mechanical engineer says “God must’ve been a mechanical engineer, I mean, look at the human skeletal system, so well put together, amazing how he did that” the electrical engineer says “no, God was an electrical engineer. Not even the bes...

Why doesn't a coffee maker need that third prong on its electrical plug?

The beans are ground.

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An electrical engineer is wrongly accused of a crime.

His name is Myto and he swears he did not kill anybody. However, all the evidence points to him. Of course, he gets 25 years in prison.

When he gets to prison, he meets his bunkmate, Big Joel. Now, contrary to what you may think, Big Joel was not a rapist. In fact, he was the nicest man Myto...

What would you call Steve Harris if he worked for an electrical company without pay?

A Powerslave

An electrical engineer is at his grandpa's funeral

His parents never told him how his grandpa had passed, so he walks around the funeral party asking for clues.
"He was at the gym" said one friend, but grandpa had a strong body and heart thought the grandson.
"It was in the bathroom," said a cousin quietly, but he would say no more.
"It was...

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a civil engineer were having a drink after work

As they drank, the conversation turned to God. Obviously, he was an engineer! But what sort of engineer?

The mechanical engineer brought up the perfection of the human joints and musculature. Surely that proved God was a mechanical engineer!

The electrical engineer responded that, wi...

An electrical engineer, a mechanical engineer, and an IT admin are in a car that won't start.

Electrical Engineer: "It has to be the battery. Let's check that."

Mechanical Engineer: "No, I think it's the engine. Let's check that instead."

IT Admin: "How about this? Let's all get out of the car and get back in."

What is black and smokes and is attached to electrical wires?

A bad electrician

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a computer engineer are riding in a car.

The car brakes down and coast to the side of the road.

"Hang on," says the mechanical engineer. "The problem is probably the engine, let me have a look at it and I'll have us on the road again in no time."

"Wait," says the electrical engineer. "The way it just stopped like that, I th...

I saw that new Queen film at a drive in and there was a terrible electrical storm during the show...

Thunderbolts and lightning! Very, very frightening!

Top 10 electrical curcuits you shouldn't touch

Number 6 will shock you!

What do electrical engineer's have for breakfast?

Serial.

what did the buddhist say to the electrical engineer?

‘ohmmmmmmmm’

Three engineering students were discussing how God designed the human body.

The first one says, "God must be a mechanical engineer. Just look at the muscles and joints."

The second one says, "No, God is an electrical engineer. See all those neurons."

The third one said, "Actually, God is a civil engineer. Who else runs a toxic waste pipeline through a recreati...

How do electrical engineers propose their partners?

j love you.

Four Engineers

4 Engineers get into a car. A Mechanical Engineer, a Petroleum Engineer, an Electrical Engineer, and a Network Engineer. They go to start the car and nothing. The Mechanical Engineer says, "Hey guys, we've got a bad starter, we're going to need to fix that before the car will start." The Petrole...

Coffee isn't electrically conductive in bean form.

But it is when it's ground.

A mechanical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a building engineer are having a night out...

After a couple of drinks, they are having a chat about god,



The mechanical engineer starts:

"Have you noticed how brilliantly humans mechanics are designed. The joints and the drivetrain are so perfectly executed, that I think God must be a mechanical engineer."


...

Three different types of engineers are debating which of their fields God must have worked in

A mechanical engineer speaks first. "Look at the joints, look at the tendons and ligaments, look at how strong our bones are. God was clearly a mechanical engineer."


An electrical engineer chimes in. "Are you kidding me? Look at the nerves, look at the way our brain can fire off a c...

An electrical bunny was arrested

It was charged with battery

Q. Which shredding guitarist is best for putting out electrical fires?

A. Eddie Van Halon.

How do you tell the difference between an electrician and an electrical engineer?

Ask them to pronounce the word, "unionized".

Nikola Tesla was in trouble - he had not done his electrical studies assignment and his teacher was not happy...

His teacher asks, "well, where is it?".

Searching for a legitimate excuse, Tesla says, "I did it - but the dog ate my ohmwork".

"You're a unit of electrical energy, Harry."

"I'm a watt?"

A chemist, a biologist and an electrical engineer were on death row waiting to go in the electric chair.

The chemist was brought forward first. "Do you have anything you want to say?" asked the executioner, strapping him in.

No," replied the chemist. The executioner flicked the switch and nothing happened. Under State law, if an execution attempt fails, the prisoner is to be released, so the che...

What do you call an electrical engineer trying to solve an issue?

Sherlock Ohms

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AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES (That Really Work!)

1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU SLICE.

2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.

3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES,...

A mechanical engineer, electrical engineer, chemical engineer, and computer engineer

One day, a mechanical engineer, electrical engineer, chemical engineer, and computer engineer were driving down the street in the same car when it broke down.

The mechanical engineer said, I think a rod broke.

The chemical engineer said, The way it sputtered at the end, I think it's ...

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I stuck an electrical circuit in her vagina....

Then got charged with battery.

^^^^^^^^thanks ^^^^^^^^/r/news ^^^^^^^^for ^^^^^^^^the ^^^^^^^^showerthought

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