Watt's my name

- Hello, are you there?
- Yes. Who are you, please?
- I'm Watt.
- What's your name?
- Watt's my name.
- Yes, what's your name?
- My name is John Watt.
- John what?
- Yes, are you James?
- No, I'm Knott.
- Will you tell me your name then?
- Will ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The computer is connected to watt?

A man calls tech support and says, "I unplugged my space heater, and then my computer just blacked out!"

Tech support: Is the power strip that your computer's plugged into still lit?

User: Yes

Tech support: What happens if you move the mouse or press a key?

User: Noth...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

With Apologies To Abbot And Costello

There were these two kids who ran away from their home in Why, Arizona. One was a tall, white kid. The other was a short, Asian kid. After running away from home, a police officer notices them. They were caught milking baby gila monsters for their venom. The cop didn't want to send them to juvi...

REM got it wrong, Kenneth

Hertz is the frequency. Watt is power.

My 3 watts blue laser pointer finally arrived and I played with it over the weekend.

I can no longer see why people say these devices were so dangerous.

What's the difference between watts and ohms?

Watts are a unit of electrical energy. Ohms are where British people live.

Electrician comes home late

Wife: Wire you insulate?

Electrician: Watt? I'm ohm now, ain't I?

Do you have any two-watt, 4-volt bulbs?

Sales Rep: For what? 

Customer: No, two. 

Sales Rep: Two what? 

Customer: Yes. 

Sales Rep: No.

What do Kevin McCallister and Chris Watts have in common?

They both made their families disappear.

A man walks into a hardware store and speaks to the cashier...

"Have you any two watt bulbs?"
"For what?"
"That’ll do, I'll take two."
"Two what?"
"I thought you didn’t have any."
"Any what?"
"Yes please!"

What did one lightbulb say to the other?

Watts up

Captain John McGrue was one of the most respected explorers

Born in England, he became known for his seafaring skills at a young age. At the age of 20, he heard the legends of the greatest drinks in the world, a quest many explorers had tried, but unfortunately none could complete the trip. McGrue was talked out of it by every friend, until at 28, already an...

Watt?

Kevin is working on a assignment and forgot what the name was for the messurement unit of electricity. He turns to he his classmate and ask him “can I ask you something”, his classmate answers “yeah, watt is it?”, kevin responds with “yeah I think it is”

Hagrid: You're a unit of power, Harry

Harry: I'm a watt?

A man once advised me to not waste electricity. "Using more power results in more electricity bills"

I told myself,



***Watt good advice***

Two physicists are walking down a hallway

One says, "kilogrammetersquaredpersecondcubed"

The second responds, "Watt?"

Student doing test: “The unit of power equivalent to 1 joule per second is called the [....]”

Friend leans over: “Watt is the answer”

Student: “I don’t know, I’ve been trying to figure it out”

My new 1000 watt sound system is great!

I can control the volume of my neighbor's banging on my door.

My friend was explaining electricity

And I was like watt?

For safety, if you're turning a power supply on at work, just say hey

Watts going on

My wife recommended I do some light reading to relax at the end of the day

Not really relaxing, as my eyes are in pain, but I managed to make out, "60 Watts - Made in China."

Electro finally made it to the party

He said watts happening!

Moms being Moms

*Issac Newton's mother--* "But did you wash the apple before eating it?"

*Archimedes's mother--* "Didn't you have any shame running naked in the street from? And, WHO is this girl Eureka???”

*Thomas Edison's mother--* Of course I am proud that you invented the electric bulb. Now tu...

I had a female Physics teacher in my school.

One day, a guy asked her, "What is the unit of power?"

"That's watt", she said.

In response to the invitation for a rather unusual reunion of all time greats.......

\* Newton said he'd drop in.
\* Socrates said he'd think about it.
\* Ohm resisted the idea.
\* Boyle said he was under too much pressure.
\* Darwin said he'd wait to see what evolved.
\* Pierre and Marie Curie radiated enthusiasm.
\* Volta was electrified at the prospe...

Why do so many tyrants try to seize power?

Because when they heard: "Watt is the meaning of life", they didn't think it was a question.

What did the energy say?

Watt the heck!

What do you say when you break up with an electrician?

Watt is love?

Baby don't hertz me.

Don't hertz me.

N-ohm-ore.

N-ohm-ore.

What is the different between the original steam engine and the improved one

*Watt

My electricity bill was running suspiciously high

Had the power company send someone over. He found a wire tapped into my house running to a neighbor's. Watt do you know, a Joule thief lives next to my Ohm.

I just electrocuted myself

How do you current-ly feel?

I'm kind of shocked

Watt, I didn't hear you

I said it hertz a lot

My wife is divorcing me because I’m obsessed with Football coaching.

In my defence, I have J.J.Watt, Michael Bennett, and Richard Sherman.

What did the blonde say after the lesson on electricity?

Watt?

The Windmill, the Coal Plant, and Geothermal Station Formed a Band

The Windmill, the Coal Plant, and Geothermal Station Formed the Band "Earth, Wind, and Fire". Their songs start off slow but eventually build in Energy. They would have been Electric too if it wasn't for their Dam manager always holding them back. He was Resistant to change and couldn't see the Pote...

I love helping blind people in my spare time.

Especially since I got my new 3 watts laser pointer.

An electrician was working at an apartment when he got electrocuted.

He died before he even knew watts up.

Dim light bulbs or bright light bulbs?

Watts the difference!

Los Angeles announced plans to lease 288 all-electric police cars. Do you know where they'll use them?

In Watts.

I'll see myself out now.

Currently.

Currently, it's better to be direct than to alternate between weak lines or else she might get confused and ask watt you doing.

What did the electrical engineer say to the other electrical engineer?

I don’t know, watt?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Proof that Santa doesn’t exists

There are about 2 billion children on earth. But Santa does not have to visit Muslims, Hindus, Jews or Buddhists, which reduces the number to 15% or 378 million. Thus, with a world average of 3.5 children per household, there are 108 million households to visit if we can assume that there are at le...

Since we're doing jokes we made up as kids: What did one lightbulb to say to the other?

Watts up?

Wich item asks the most questions in a hardware store?

The 60 watt bulb

Samuel L. Jackson is obsessed with the SI unit of power.

He keeps telling me to say watt again.

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