When my wife told me that the Prime Minister of Canada got re-elected, I thought she was lying.

It’s Trudeau.

The CEO of IKEA was just elected president in Sweden.

He should have his cabinet together by the end of the week.

The year is 2020 and the United States has just elected the first woman, from Alabama , as president.

The year is 2020 and the United States has just elected the first woman, from Alabama , as president.

A few days after the election the president-elect calls her father and says,

'So, Daddy, I assume you will be coming to my inauguration?'

'I don't think so. It's a 16 hour driv...

The first Jewish President of the United States is elected

The night before the inauguration he calls his mother.

"Mom, I'd love for you to come visit for the inauguration and stay with me for a few days."

"Oh I don't know, airfare is so expensive these days."

"Mom, I'll fly you out on Air Force One!"

"Oh, but you know, cab fa...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A wealthy village man, Narendra Singh, is elected the leader of a group of villages in North India

He decides to give a victory speech to each of these villages. To do this, however, he realized he would need a secretary to introduce him and brag about how great he is, because it would look stupid if he did it himself. So he hires Mohan Nath, a highly respected member of his own village.

M...

If Biden is elected, I'm leaving the country

If Trump is reelected, I'm leaving the country.

This is not a political post. I just want to travel.

How do you talk to elected officials?

Like you're about to fire them.

A Catholic Priest and a Rabbi were chatting one day when the conversation turned to a discussion of job descriptions and promotion

"What do you have to look forward to in way of a promotion in your job?" asked the Rabbi.

"Well, I'm next in line for the Monsignor's job." replied the Priest.

"Yes, and then what?" asked the Rabbi.

"Well, next I can become Bishop." said the Priest.

"Yes, and then?" asked...

Did you here that all newly elected politicians have to take an updated oath of office?

It’s now called the Hypocratic Oath...

"How can this idiot possibly be elected as president?"

Says a nation that hasn't gotten over the death of a gorilla in 6 months.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

If that fucker Trump gets re-elected, I'm going to Mexico

but not by choice though

It shouldn't be surprising our first black president was elected prior to Trump

It's always darkest before Don

Hillary Clinton is elected president, . . .

and on the first night she spends in the White House, she is visited by the ghost of George Washington. She asks him, "George, what can I do to best serve the United States?"

The ghost of George Washington responds, "Never tell a lie."

She says, "Oh, I don't think I can do that."
...

Why can't mixolydian get elected?

Its leading tone is flat.

In the year 2000, Putin was elected President of Russia...

The night after he was sworn into office, Vladimir Putin had a dream. In it, he stood in a long, elegant hall, and was surrounded by all of the great leaders of Russia, from Ivan the Terrible to Boris Yeltsin. Looking around at them all, he eventually bows his head and says:

"Great rulers o...

If Trump is re-elected I will stay in the country

I can't get back over the wall anyway.

Trump is reportedly upset that the Ukraine just elected a comedian as president.

Oh, Crimea river!

THE problem with political jokes

is that sometimes they get elected!

If Hillary Clinton was elected, she would have been the first f president.

I would say female, but the emale got deleted.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There once was a wasp that lived in a jungle.

This was not your ordinary wasp though; he was smart, philosophical even. One day he finally got fed up with his repetitive, insignificant life and decided that he would leave his hive, his family, his entire close-knit wasp community and he would go out into the world and make something of himself,...

When I was a boy, my dad told me the great thing about America is that anyone could be elected a governor, senator, or even the President!

I'm starting to believe him.

If Hillary Clinton is elected as our first female President it's really going to redefine a few things for me....

....Like the words President Bush.

Hillary Clinton is elected President.

On her first night in the White House (not counting when she was first lady), she is visited by the ghost of George Washington.

She asks, "What can I do to help America?"

Washington replies "Serve your country selflessly and always be honest"

*Hillary laughs in his face*

...

Russia's president wasn't elected....

He was Putin!

A politician finds a magic lamp, rubs it and a genie pops out.

The genie says “I shall grant you any wish you ask, on the condition that when I ask, you set me free and when I ask you acknowledge my part in your wish.”

The politician agrees and after much consideration, he wishes that his lies and exaggerations would come true.

He holds a press c...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How could Donald Trump ever get elected in this great nation?

...said the country pissed off that the super bowl didn’t play music from spongebob.

In the Catholic Church, the pope is elected for life.

Putin has met with 3 of them.

One day, a family from mexico moves up from Mexico city all the way to Jacksonville Florida

One day, a family from mexico moves up from Mexico city all the way to Jacksonville Florida. They settle in a small little house. The neighbors are a little skeptical, being their race and all, so they keep an eye out on their plot for a few days. To his suprise, he sees that the family is one of th...

Why don't horses get elected to congress?

Because they are naysayers.

After being elected President, Bernie Sanders confronted...

...General Keith B. Alexander (the head of the NSA) and asked him on what grounds he wanted to continue observing the American people's cell phone/internet communications.

The General sighed and shook his head. "Some men just want to watch the world, Bern."

I'd make a political joke but it would just end up being elected president

Ba Dum Tss

BREAKING: Barack Obama just elected President of the US

- Sent from Internet Explorer

Trump's first day at the Oval Office after being elected President

First briefing by the CIA, Pentagon, FBI:

Trump: We must destroy ISIS immediately. No delays.

CIA: We cannot do that, sir. We created them along with Turkey, Saudi, Qatar and others.

Trump: The Democrats created them.

CIA: We created ISIS, sir. You need them or else you w...

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