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Dylan was practicing his golf swing in his front yard when he swung a little too hard and sent the ball through his neighbors window. He rang the bell but nobody answered so he opened the door to see an old lamp lying near broken glass and a huge fat Arabian man wearing a turban sitting on the couch

Dylan asked, "Who are you?" The fat man replied, "I am a genie you have freed from that lamp."

Dylan questioned, "Oh man, do I get three wishes?" The genie replied, "Since you freed me by accident you only get two and I get one."

Dylan thought about it and realized what he wanted, "I w...

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NSFW Dylan, a Welsh farmer who'd had a few too many headed to the pub's men's room when nature called.....

While standing at the urinal trough he suddenly had a puzzled look on his face. He quickly finished his business and ran out to speak to the bartender. Leaning in close he whispered to the bartender:

"I know I'm pretty drunk, but I swear I saw a black guy with a white dick in the bathroom! Hu...

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My dick is like a Bob Dylan song

You may not like it but your mother loves it

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"Don't criticise what you can't understand." - Bob Dylan

I fucking hate that quote. What does it even mean?!

The sand pit

Dylan was playing in the sand pit with Ellie. He comes back from recess and speaks to his teacher.

She asks him "What did you do in recess today?"
"I played in the sandbox with Ellie" he says.

"That's great! If you can write the word "sand" on the board, I'll give you a cookie."<...

SC shooting suspect Dylan Roof has been apprehended.

He was charged with impersonating a police officer.

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What do you call it when Bob Dylan sucks your dick in a hurricane?

The answer, my friend, is blowing in the wind. The answer is blowing in the wind

Bob Dylan misspoke and would like to issue a correction

"It was me you were looking for, babe."

One day Eddie Vedder and Bob Dylan got into an argument.

nobody knows why.

The Teacher Asked the Class to Name Something that Ends in -Tor and Eats Things.

Gabe raised his hand first. He said, "Predator."

"Clever answer! They sure eat things!" The teacher told him.

Next, Dylan raised his hand. "Oh! I know! Raptor!"

"You are very smart! Raptors eat many different things," the teacher said.

Then, little Timmy answered. "Vibrat...

"Did you ever lie down on the tracks?"

Not personally. I once knew somebody who did.

"What happened?"

I lost track of him.

Bob Dylan

My friend Larry

A friend of mine named Larry once told me, around the time of Bill Clinton's 2nd inauguration, "You know, President Clinton and I are buddies."
I said, "Sure you are."
He said, "No, really! Just turn on your TV tonight to the Inaugural Ball. You'll see me."
Sure enough, I turned on the TV t...

What do you do if you miss your mother-in-law?

Reload.

(Thanks Bob Dylan via Theme Time Radio Hour)

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