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Disposable Jokes

Just realized I really like Eggs Benedict when they're served on disposable dishes..

There's just no plates like foam for the Hollandaise

I ordered some disposable lenses and got an empty box.

They said I must have selected Contactless delivery.

On their wedding night, a die-hard golfer makes a confession to his new bride.

"Dearest, I love you more than I can say." He paused. "But I also love golf. And I want you to know that every possible weekend, every vacation, every dollar of disposable income, I will spend on golf, golf memberships, golf vacations, golf clubs.

I know you knew some of this, but I wanted to...

What happened when the '90s kid saw a disposable camera?

It gave them a flashback!

What is the difference between a corrupt cop and a disposable camera?

A disposable camera doesn't have to reload 3 times to take 30 shots.

A girl climbed a tree at the back of the church

A girl climed a tree behind the church to pick fruits. While picking her fruits high above the tree a priest happens to walk by and sees the girl up above him and realized that the girl was not wearing any underwear. .
He calls the girl down and tells her that it's dangerous to climb tress and gi...

A man went to the dentist to schedule getting a tooth pulled.

"I don't have a lot of money." he confessed. "Is there any way we could make the procedure cheaper?"


"I suppose for a small discount," thought the dentist, "We could reuse some of our disposable tools. It may slightly increase your risk of infection, but, theoretically, you should be fi...

I like my men like I like my catheters

Sterile and disposable.

Chinese Exports

Everyone is always talking about how cheap and disposable Chinese exports are, and now that they’ve finally delivered something of substance everyone is already sick of it...

What do you call an amputated finger?

Disposable thumb

In the stock market today

Helium was up, feathers were down, paper was stationary, Fluorescent lights were down in light trading, knives were up sharply, pencil were down a few points, elevators were up and down, escalators experienced a slight decline, mining equipment hit rock bottom, the market for raisins dried up, vacuu...

Jack and Jim are busy stocking the aisles at Sams Club...

They're stacking pallets of Lipton's. They're about to put the last pallet on top when the forklift breaks down.
"Oh NO!", Jim exclaims, "How will we get this last pallet on top without killing ourselves?"
"Don't Worry", says Jack," just go pick up one of those disposable Bic's on the sh...

A comedian was on vacation in London.

A comedian was on a vacation in London when he came across a large crowd. He pushed and squeezed his way past the ocean of people and saw the Royal Family who were on their way to have lunch. As he takes out his phone to snap a photo, he saw from the corner of his eye a shady man pushing past the cr...

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