Our marijuana dispensary has a recorded message...

“If you want to buy marijuana press the hash key now”.

I applied for a job at a marijuana dispensary, and was surprised to learn that I would have to take a drug test.

I hope it's multiple choice. I tested meth, crack, *and* weed.

I’m opening a dispensary that sells weed and doughnuts.

It called glazed and confused.

The other day I saw an event a local church was having at a dispensary where they were giving away donuts and spreading the Word of God

They called it Glaze It, Blaze It, and Praise It

Obi-Wan Kenobi started a marijuana dispensary on Tatooine. What's it called?

The High Ground.

I want to open a dispensary for people who like weed, but not too much...

...I’m going to call it *Herb Your Enthusiasm*.

What do you call a married couple who both work in a dispensary?

A joint-income household

A few partners and myself are planning to open a combination chiropractic office and marijuana dispensary.

It's going to be a joint joint joint joint joint.

Seen at the dispensary today....If you have to cough, please do it far away. Otherwise you may be asked

To far cough

Chris Rock, The Rock, and Kid Rock walk into a marijuana dispensary

*something about being stoned*

I tried.

If the marijuana dispensary gets flooded...

...is that considered high water?

What do you say when you want a THC drink at a dispensary?

Can I have a cannadis?

Who decided to call it a "Marijuana Dispensary"?

And not a "Bakery"

Did you hear about the Nuns up north who started a marijuana dispensary?

Holy smokes...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear about the dispensary that was selling suppositories?

It turns out they were just blowing smoke up everyone's ass.

Post Grad Plans

When my son graduated high school, he wanted to open up a dispensary, but i wanted him to become a doctor. When it came time to choose I told him: "It’s my way, or the highway.”

I'm thinking of moving to Colorado

When I get there, I'll open a combination dispensary and fast food restaurant.
I'll call it the Burger Joint.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

So I'm trying to start a new Nazi group...

But it's hard to get people to leave the already established groups, they’re built up, they have community there, then I have it. Weed. We’re going to be the weed Nazis, I get a sponsorship from a local skinhead dispensary, I set up a space, but there’s one problem, I only have 2 water pipes, for t...

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