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Chilled Jokes

Hindus are so chilled out.

They never have beef with anyone.

What do you call ice that is chilled to -273.15°C?

Still water.

My friend's a scientist and accidentally chilled his lab rat to absolute zero...

At first the rat was just frozen, but he's 0K now.

When matter gets chilled it's often slows down to a stop

Does this imply the existence of a super chilled out version of my dad that doesn't beat me?

Scientists announced that a man had chilled himself to absolute zero in an industrial accident.

He's 0K right now.

Nasa was experimenting with different animals in space.

Monkeys were an obvious choice, but they had no patience. Mice chewed all the cables, dogs were too stupid and chickens were always scared. It seemed the only animal that could cope with the intense stress of space travel was a chilled out alley cat.

After a few months of testing and training...

An Irishman walks into a bar, and orders three pints, all at once.

He does this for several days, drinking one, and then the next one, and then the last one. After a week or two, the bartender says
"You know, I can bring you your drinks one at a time, so they stay fresh and cold"
"No, no" the Irishman says to the bartender "I have two brothers. One...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A plumber is called to a house with nobody home

When he arrived there was a note that read "sorry we can't be home but here's a key to let yourself in. Beware of Spike the dog, and whatever you do, DO NOT talk to the parrot"

The guy walks into the house and sees a big doberman, but it seems calm so he goes about his business.

While ...

What do you get when you put an 8-year old in the fridge?

A chilled!

What do you call a "Grilled Cheese" after a few days in the fridge?

Chilled Grease

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A group of guys walk into a new bar for the first time. The barkeep asks what they will be having tonight. [L]

The first guy orders a whiskey coke. The bartender without hesitation hands the man a chilled apple. The man confused by this asks why he is getting the apple. The bartender insists that he takes a bite out of it.

The man chomps into it and exclaims, “Wow! This tastes just like my favorite wh...

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