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Celebrates Jokes

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My conservative Christian parents sent me to one of those massive youth group events that celebrates how cool it is to be a virgin

Joke's on them, I went to the Star Trek convention next door instead

Paul McCartney celebrates his 80th birthday with Stella in Mykonos.

You would think with all his wealth, he would have bought at least ONE bottle of Champagne.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Which religion celebrates Ass Wednesday?

Bootyism

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Couple celebrates their 30th anniversay

A couple celebrates their 30th anniversary. They have a nice evening out, dining in their favourite restaurant.

Later that night, when they get to bed, the woman says to her husband: "You know what honey, tonight, you can do anything you want with me."

The husband thinks for a second, ...

When Usain Bolt finishes in 9 seconds the world celebrates

But when I do it my girlfriend gets disappointed...

What holiday celebrates the rising of dough?

Yeaster.

My family celebrates Christmas religiously

Every year.

What month celebrates Holocaust deniers?

July.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

GameStop celebrates Pride and it seems fitting.

GameStop is Pansexual: Fucks everyone without any discrimination.

Old couple celebrates their 50th anniversary

An old couple celebrates their 50th wedding anniversary in their home.

“Just think," the old man says, "we were sitting here at this same breakfast table, naked as jaybirds, 50 years ago."

“Well," the old lady snickers, "what do you say, should we get naked?"

The two immediat...

A lottery winner celebrates by buying himself a Rolls-Royce and membership of the local golf club.

Obviously when he gets the car he has to drive it straight round to the golf club and make sure all the members get to see it, and he's ostentatiously buying drinks for the whole bar but sticking to lemonade himself because he's "got to drive the Roller home later, you know", and when it's time to g...

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