Buffalo Jokes

Their child would be a real buffoon.

Bison

About 25 pounds.


How do you change that?


Force-feed the buffalo or shave yo momma.


(I almost feel bad for trotting out a joke older than most Redditors but I can't.)

...bison-tennial

Jeez, in Kentucky we just say she fell outta bed

A cowboy rode to Montana to try the famed Buffalo Steak he had heard about in his travels. He ventured to a tribe of Natives and asked if they had ever herd of or eaten Buffalo steaks before. He of course did not speak their language, but they understood his silly gestures, nodded and equally gestur... read more

It was his bison-tennial.

Two guys from Buffalo die and wake up in hell. The next day, the devil stops to check on them and sees them dressed in parkas, mittens and bomber hats, warming themselves around the fire. The devil asks them, "What are you doing? Isn't it hot enough for you?"
The two guys reply, "Well, you know, ... read more

He had a bison.

To help him, he hired a Native American scout.

The two of them set off on their journey to find buffalo.

After riding awhile, the scout gets off his horse, puts his ear to the ground and says "Hmmm, buffalo come."

The soldier scans the area with his binoculars, but sees nothing.... read more

As they travel along, one member puts his ear to the ground for a moment and then says: “Buffalo come.”

The chief asks “How can you tell?”

The man replies “Sticky ear.”

A booffalo.

It’s impossible to reduce weight by eating green grass and salads and walking

It turns out they were stamp eating across the Midwest.

So he hired a local Indian to help him find the nearest herd. After several days of riding, the quiet old Indian suddenly stopped, jumped down from his mount, and put one ear to the ground. “Here,” he said. “Buffalo come.” The cowboy asked, “How do you know?” The Indian wiped his cheek and replied, ... read more

You can't wash your hands in a buffalo.

I've recently started going to the gym so I can have big arm muscles but I'm thinking of quitting and just getting a buffalo tattoo instead. That way when I wave to people it can still be a buff hello .

steamed beef

“I love you son, have a safe trip and don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”

A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the re... read more

Bison

He said make it quick he's roaming.

An Indian and a cowboy are walking through the prairie one day.
The Indian stops and puts his ear to the ground and says "ah, buffalo come."
In which the cowboy replies:
"Dang, you can tell that from stickin yer ear to the ground?"
Indian says:
"No. Ear sticky."

One of these preparations for many years has been tuning in to the local radio station at 6:00 the night before a storm for an important announcement.

On a typical pre-storm night, the wife would tune in just prior to 6 to hear a message about which side of the street cars were to be parked o... read more

....For What it's Worth

Chick Fillet

...but I gave up writing it halfway through.

A buffalo suddenly dies unknowingly in a farming family, whole family got upset.

One night the father came out of his house and started crying near the well. Suddenly a fairy comes up from the well..She asked why is he crying? he tells her the reason that his his buffalo has died.

She ... read more

Because the last word he ever said to me was "Bison."

To proudly support his Bison.

The father buffalo smiles and says, "thank you for confiding in me, I always thought you were bison."

It goes ka-yaking.

Courtesy of my 10 year old

His *bison*tennial!

A mist steak

I figured I would take him since his people are rather well known for living off the buffalo before they went relativly extinct. So while we were out in the field I just followed him and let him lead the way. Eventually he said he thought he had begun to find a trail but we later lost it.

So... read more

After having dug to a depth of 10 feet last year outside of Buffalo, New York scientists found traces of copper cable dating back 120 years. They came to the conclusion that their ancestors already had a telephone network more than 100 years ago.

Not to be outdone by the New Yorkers, in the w... read more

Bi-son

Her: Ok. By Buffalo?

Me: No, I was thinking of taking a car.