This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A husband leaves the house to go pick up dinner for he and his wife. Shortly after leaving, the doorbell rings. It is her husbands best friend and she invites him in. Since she is in her bathrobe the man says to her "you have the nicest breasts."

She says, "thanks but my husband would be mad if he heard you." He replies "I would pay you $50 just to see one of them." She thinks for a minute and decides to do it. He says "Wow that is the most perfect breast I ever saw... I will give you another $50 if you show me both at the same time." She do...

A woman got breast implants made of wood yesterday.

This joke would be funny if it had a punchline wooden tit?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I once made love to a woman with twelve breasts...

Sounds nice, *doesn't it*?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Once upon a time there lived a beautiful Queen with large breasts.

Sid, the Dragon Slayer, obsessed over the Queen for this reason. He knew that the penalty for his desire would be death, should he try to touch them, but he had to try.


One day Sid revealed his secret desire to his colleague, Nathan


the Erudite lawyer, the King's chief adviser....

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a haunted pair of breasts?

BoOoOoOoOobs

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A guy walking down the street sees a woman with perfect breasts. He says to her, “Hey miss, would you let me bite your breasts for $100 dollars?”

“Are you nuts?!” – she replies, and keeps walking away. He turns around, runs around the block and gets to the corner before she does.

“Would you let me bite your breasts for $1,000 dollars?” – he asks again.

“Listen you; I’m not that kind of woman! Got it?” So the guy runs around the ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call the space between 2 artificial breasts?

Silicone Valley......

I'll leave and close the door behind me

What does women breast and Disney land have in common?

They are made for kids but adults enjoy them!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Group of guys, all turning 40, discussed where they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the waitresses had big breasts and wore mini-skirts.

Ten years later, at age 50, the friends once again discussed where
they should meet for lunch. Finally it was agreed that they would meet
at Wetherspoons in Uxbridge because the waitresses were attractive.
The food and service was good and the beer selection was excellent.

Ten years ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A plastic surgeon was offering discounts on breast implants.

The sign read:

A sale of two titties

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Since women with big breasts work at Hooters, where do women with one leg work at?

IHOP😜

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A attractive woman asked "breasts or legs"

I said "I'm interested in feet and anal"

Now I'm not welcome in that KFC restaurant.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a Siren with giant breasts?

A booby trap.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

God created woman, and she had 3 breasts.

He said to the woman, "Is there anything on you that you'd like to change?"
She said, "Yes. Could you get rid of this middle breast?"

God snapped his fingers and it was done.

She exclaimed, holding the third breast in her hand,

"What am I going to do with this useless tit?"...

Every day I see my big-breasted neighbour doing gardening work in front of the house.

I really hope his wife tells him to put a shirt on someday.

What do you call breast’s without nipples?

Pointless

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A husband tells his wife that he met a girl with 12 breasts.

Husband: I met a girl with 12 breast.

Wife : That sounds strange.

Husband: Dozentit.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There is a new female organ player at a small church...

She is a beautiful woman, but there is a problem: her ample bosom is causing an issue with the men in the church. While playing the organ, her breasts bounce and sway. Men in the church are getting distracted and many get in trouble with their wives for gazing longingly at her.

An old woman ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man in a hotel lobby turns to go to the front desk, but he accidentally runs into a woman beside him and his elbow bumps into her breast. They are both quite startled.

The man turns to her and says, "Ma'aM, iF youR hearT iS sofT aS youR breasT ,I knoW you'lL forgivE mE." She replies, "If your penis is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 436."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Good Italian Girls

A young Italian-American girl was going on a date.....

Her Nonna said: "Sita here ana letame tella you about those-a younga boys.

He's agonna try ana kiss you, you are agonna likea dat ... but don't let him do that.

He's agonna try ana kiss your breasts, you are agonna likea d...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a big breasted Egyptian woman?

Nefertitty

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A small church had a very attractive big-busted organist, and her breasts were so large that they bounced and jiggled while she played the organ.

Unfortunately, she distracted the male part of the congregation considerably. The very proper church ladies were appalled. They said something had to be done about this or they would have to get another organist.

So one of the ladies approached Susan very discreetly about the problem, & ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man goes into a pub, and the barmaid asks what he wants. "I want to bury my face in your cleavage and lick the sweat from between your breasts" he says.

"You dirty prick!" shouts the barmaid, "Get out before I fetch my husband!" The man apologises and promises not to repeat his gaffe.

The barmaid accepts this and asks him again what he wants. "I want to pull your pants down, spread yoghurt between the cheeks of your arse and lick it all off" ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What did the woman with 7 large breasts have?

Huge quantitties

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My girlfriend asked me whether I like breasts or legs.

Apparently, wings was not the correct answer.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

When I’m watching porn, I don’t care if they have big breasts, big butts or a pretty face.

I'm a jack off all traits.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man is walking in the street and sees a women with the most beautiful breasts he’s ever seen.

He walks up to her and asks: “If I give you 10’000$, will you let me bite your boob?”
The woman, quite shocked, obviously says no.
The man then asks if he can bite her breast for 100’000$. The woman still says no. The man asks for 1’000’000$, 10’000’000$ and 100’000’000$ but the woman still re...

I asked my mom if I could try to breast feed one more time.

It was a trip down mammary lane.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Do you know why chicken breasts are so meaty?

They are always working on their pecks.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Young man moves into an apartment block….

On the first day he discovers the neighbour across the hall is a stunningly beautiful girl with a gorgeous body.

One day he’s just about to enter his apartment and his neighbour opens her door, she is just wearing a black lace negligee with matching panties, he can’t help but stare.

S...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Pierre the French fighter pilot was the greatest fighter pilot the world had ever seen.

His skill in a plane was rivaled only by his skill in bed and he had many a fair young thing aching for his love.

On a bright summer day he was picnicking with a young lady in the shade of a willow tree near a lake. They had talked for a while but the woman could wait no longer and she leane...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman gets a free tattoo after showing the artist one of her breasts.

It was a tit-for-tat situation.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My favourite joke to perform. Terrible accent recommended.

Pierre, zee French fighter pilot is with his amour.

"Oh, Pierre, I want you to kiss me", she exclaims.

And so he tilts her chin up and leans in, but just before he plants a kiss on her lips, he pours a little red wine on them, and then goes in for the kiss.

"Oh, Pierre, mon di...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Twelve priests were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up in a straight row, totally nude in a garden, while a sexy and beautiful big breasted nude model danced before them.

Each priest had a small bell attached to his penis and they were told that anyone whose bell rang when she danced in front of them would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of spiritual purity.
The beautiful model danced before the first candidate with no reaction. She proceeded do...

During a biology exam a student has to list three pros of breast milk.

He's unprepared, but starts looking for common sense answers and writes down:

- Contains all the nutrients a baby needs,

- Doesn't need heating,

But he still needs one more. And just as the time is about to run out, the student writes:

- Has great packaging.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

At the age of 91 we discovered two lumps in grandma's breasts

We were so relieved the doctors discovered it was just her knees

What's the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants...?

One's a crusty bus station and one's a busty crustacean.

Grandma found a lump under her left breast but the Dr said it's ok.

It was just her kneecap.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call breasts that have both magnitude and direction?

Vector quantitties

Breast feeding in public.

My only problem with women breast feeding in public.


They never wink back.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room

The Doctor arrived, examined the baby, checked his weight, and seeming a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed.

"Breast-fed," she replied.

"Strip down to your waist," the Doctor said.

She did.

He pinched her nipples, then pressed, kneaded, and r...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lady had lost her husband almost four years ago. Her daughter was constantly calling her to get back into the dating world. Finally, she said she'd go out, but didn't know anyone. Her daughter immediately replied, "Mom, I have someone for you to meet!"

Well, it was an immediate hit.

They took to one another and after dating for six weeks, he asked her to join him for a weekend in Spain.

Their first night there, she undressed as he did.

There she stood nude, except for a pair of black panties, he in his birthday suit.

Lo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My breasts haven’t grown much since I decided to transition

I guess that’s what I get for cutting out all of my trans fat

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My wife thrust a picture under my nose. "What the fuck is this!" she asked. "Well," I calmly replied, "It appears to be a photo of me fondling your sister's massive breasts... But you do know that's not real, don't you, babe?" "Really? she said, calming down.

"Obviously" I replied, "They're implants".

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Queen Elizabeth and Dolly Parton die on the same day and they both go before an Angel to find out if they'll be admitted to Heaven Unfortunately, there's only one space left that day, so the Angel must decide which of them gets in.

The Angel asks Dolly if there's some particular reason why she should go to Heaven.

Dolly takes off her top and says, 'Look at these, they're the most perfect breasts God ever created, and I'm sure it will please God to be able to see them every day, for eternity.'

The Angel thanks Dol...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman went into a doctor's office with a baby. She's taken into an examining room and waits for the doctor. The doctor examines the baby, and finds him not gaining much weight and asks the woman, "Is he breast fed or on the bottle?" "Oh...he is breast fed!", replied the woman.

"Well then, strip down to your waist," orders the doctor. She takes off her top and bra and sits on the examining table. The doc starts pressing, kneading and pinching both breasts for quite a while in a very detailed and thorough examination. The doc motions to her to get dressed, then the doctor s...

The advantages of breast milk

The not necessarily well-prepared student sat in his life science classroom staring at a question on the final exam paper.

The question directed: 'Give four advantages of breast milk.' What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:

1...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Apparently the man was smothered to death between a pair of breasts.

There was no sign of a struggle.

Today a woman was walking down the street with her blouse open and her right breast hanging out.

When I got face to face with the woman, I said, "Miss, are you aware that you could be cited for indecent exposure?"

"Why?" the woman asked.

"Well," I said, "Your right breast is hanging out of your blouse."

The woman quickly looked down and screamed, "Oh my God! I left my baby ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Found out why Americans are obsessed with breasts!

All their cooking recipes are in cup sizes

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A family is at the dinner table. The son asks the father, “Dad, how many kinds of boobs are there?”

The father, surprised, answers, “Well son, a woman goes through three phases. In her 20s, a woman's breasts are like melons, round and firm. In her 30s and 40s, they are like pears, still nice, hanging a bit. After 50 they are like onions.” “Onions?” the son asks. “Yes, you see them and they make yo...

In surgery for a heart attack, a middle-aged woman has a vision of God by her bedside. “Will I die?” she asks.

God says, “No. You have 30 more years to live.”

With 30 years to look forward to, she decides to make the best of it. So since she’s in the hospital, she gets breast implants, liposuction, a tummy tuck, hair transplants, and collagen injections in her lips. She looks great! The day she’s disc...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

John, Paul and Frank go to heaven (flagging it NSFW just in case)

When they arrive at the gate, St. Peter checks the list and tells them a bit about heaven: "It's a great place. The fountains are full of the best wine, we have the best food that appears when you think of it. Your housing will be the most beautiful and luxurious villa you couldn't even dream of on ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A prostitute in Utrecht walked into a doctor's office asking for information about a breast enlargement.

When asked how she'd pay for it, she said she had insurance. The doctor was curious why it would be covered. She replied that it covers ergonomic improvements

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I just read an article on a woman with 12 breasts

Seems fake, dozen tit?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Model trains are like breasts

They are there for the children but it’s the father that winds up playing with them the most.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

After seeing my new tattoo, my angered wife retaliated by getting a breast reduction...

tit for tat.

Q: How much calcium is in a woman's breast?

A: Enough to make a bone grow big and hard!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does a 60 year old woman have between her breasts than an 18 year old woman does not?

Her bellybutton.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dad, a girl invited me over to her house

"Oh that is great, Billy. But you should be careful, you are young and an STD or unwanted pregnancy is going to be devastating. Please, remember to wear a condom if the situation arises... Actually, no. I don't trust you, son. Put it on right now, because at the heat of the moment you will forget." ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Many years ago during my married days, I accidentally overturned my golf cart.

Elizabeth, a very attractive and keen golfer, who lived in a villa on the golf course, heard the noise and called out: "Are you okay? What's your name?"

"It's John, and I'm okay, thanks," I replied as I pulled myself out of the twisted cart.

"John," she said, (firm loose breasts undula...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Sign Language in the Shower

A man is doing yard work and his wife is about to take a shower. The man realizes that he can't find the rake. He yells up to his wife, "Where is the rake?" She can't hear him and shouts back, "What? The man first points to his eye, then points to his knee and finally makes a raking motion. The wif...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call breasts that can hold information for short periods of time?

Random Access Mammory.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today, than on Alzheimer's research....

This means by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs, huge erections, and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Motorcycle

Joe wanted to buy a motorcycle. He doesn't have much luck, until one day, he comes across a Harley with a FOR SALE sign on it. The bike seems even better than a new one, although it is 10 years old. It's shiny and in absolute mint condition. He immediately buys it and asks the seller how he kept it ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This is as good a day as any to post this old one...

An older catholic priest is sweeping up between the pews after mass when a very attractive scantily clad young woman rushes into the church. She is visibly upset as she runs up to the priest, holding her face in her hands and sobbing.

Although the priest noticed her ample physique and skim...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

He had a huge smile on his face as his wife moved forward, then backwards, forward, then backwards again......back and forth....in and out.......She could feel the sweat on her forehead, between her breasts and trickling down the small of her back. She was getting near to the end…

...her heart was pounding..... her face was flushed.....

Then she moaned, softly at first, then began to groan louder.

Finally, totally exhausted, she let out an almighty scream and shouted,

"Okay, Okay!!! I can't park the car!!! You do it, you smug fucking asshole!!!"

What do you call the cleavage between breast implants?

Silicon Valley

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How old am I? I need to feel your breast..

A woman decides to have a face lift for her 50th birthday. She spends £15,000 and looks sensational.

On her way home, she stops at a news stand to buy a newspaper. Before leaving, she says to the clerk, ‘I hope you don’t mind my asking, but how old do you think I am?”.

‘About 32,’ ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A very attractive girl goes to confession (NSFW)

Girl: "Forgive me Father for I have sinned"

Priest: "What did you do Child?"

Girl: "I called a man a son of a bitch."

Priest: "Why did you call him a son of a bitch?"

Girl: "Because he touched my hand."

Priest: "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)

Girl: "Ye...

A woman had chronic headaches.

She had them since she was in her early teens, and had gone to the doctor, had x-rays, scans, medication, and nothing seemed to help. Finally, she went to a headache specialist, and he told her that her left breast was the cause. The only treatment was to remove the breast. The good news was that he...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Three women were getting together for brunch and started bragging about their husbands.

"MY husband, " says the first " just took me on a vacation to France'" and she smiled while her friends congratulated her for her good fortune.

"Well my husband just bought me a new Lexus." says the second, receiving her accolades.

"Well. I don't know if it's a big deal or not," starts...

[NSFW] If a woman gets a breast implant at a discount...

Does that make it a clearance rack?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A couple is spending the afternoon at the zoo...

and they get to the gorilla exhibit. The lonely gorilla stares at the very hot wife and squeezes its breast.

- Look honey, I guess the gorilla wants a flash.
- But here? Well, there's no one around so I guess I can try...

She lifts her shirt, showing the gorilla a perfect set of boo...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Many women with large breasts are actually men.

Turns out ladies with double D's are laddies.

My grandma had a scare when she felt a lump under her breast

Turns out it was just her knee cap

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Whenever I am asked if I am a breast or thigh guy, I always tell them I am mostly in to anal...

Which always ends in me being asked to leave the KFC!

A woman didn't know how to speak Spanish but was married to a Spanish man and together, they resided in Spain.

Once she went to the market to buy some chicken legs. She lifted her skirt a little and pointed to her legs so that the shopkeeper is able to understand her.

Another time, she had to buy chicken breast so she pointed to her bosom so that the shopkeeper is able to understand her

Once s...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A woman wants to increase the size of her breasts.

So she goes to see Dr. Johnson who tells her she must do an exercise rhythmically and on a schedule of 10am and 2pm. He instructs her to bend each elbow one at a time and recite "If I do this as I must, I will increase my bust". She does this religiously twice a day for two weeks and sees some impr...

[LONG] A Man walks into a bar.

A short man, with thick glasses, a calculator in is breast pocket, a huge notebook tucked under his arm, and a pencil behind his ears, walks into a bar.

At this bar they have a contest. On the bar counter is a large jar filled with 100s of dollars, and next to it is a basket of lemons.
...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was fairly confident that the German prostitute was actually a man, but I hired them anyway in case I was wrong.

I was hoping for the breast but expecting the wurst.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A golfer is absolutely killing it out on the course. (Long)

He’s playing at one of those residential courses surrounded by beautiful homes.

He nails the drive on the 6th hole. He’s so excited and proud of himself that he guns his golf cart full speed ahead to get to the putting green.

He’s going so fast that he misreads a curve and ends up topp...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Over the last few months I became a victim of a clever scam while shopping at Home Depot.

Simply going out to get supplies


has turned out to be very traumatic for me. Don't be


naïve enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your


friends. Here's how the scam works:


Two seriously good-looking 20-21 year-old girls come over

...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I used to date a girl that had her breasts on her back.

She wasn’t much to look at, but she was really fun to slow dance with.

I had breast cancer once...

Those were some bad mammaries.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Freudian Slip

Tim needs to get to Cincinnati. He decides to take a train. When he walks up to the ticket counter the woman behind the counter had huge breasts. He tells her " I would like Cicket to TITSanati, um I mean a Ticket to Cincinnati." The woman blushes and laughs it off. Tim gets his ticket and boards t...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A 45 y.o. married woman went for a medical check-up

After she returned home she says to her husband:
'Good news, everything is ok, & the doctor even said I have the breasts of a 25 y.o. woman'


Husband says: 'Oh really, & what did he say about your 45 y.o. ass?'


Wife: 'Funnily enough, your name never came up'

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do old women have between their breasts that young women don't?

A belly button.

I asked an Italian plastic surgeon what he uses for breast implants

He just replied "Si"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call a haunted pair of breasts?

Booooooooobies!

Happy Halloween! Stay safe everyone!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I was telling a woman about my ability to guess the day she was born just by feeling her breasts.

“Really,” she said, “go ahead and try.” After about thirty seconds of fondling, she began to lose patience and said, “Come on, tell me what day I was born?” I said, “Yesterday.”

I think women breast feeding in public is disgusting.

I was always taught that if you didn't bring enough for the entire class, nobody gets to have any.

I met a guy who could remember every breast he’d ever seen

He had photographic mammary

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What gets longer if pulled, fits snugly between breasts, slides neatly into a hole, chokes people when used incorrectly, and works well when jerked?

A seatbelt

The Tempur-pedic Mattress company has come out with a line of breast implants...

...They're mammary foam.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How do you say small breasts in French ?

Pe'tits'

What do you get when you give the bottom of the sea breast implants?

Davy Jones' Knockers

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A nun and a priest are crossing the Sahara desert on a camel

On the third day out the camel suddenly dropped dead without warning. After dusting themselves off, the nun and the priest surveyed their situation. After a long period of silence, the priest spoke.

"Well sister, this looks pretty grim."

"I know, father." "In fact, I don't think it lik...

You hear about the girl-ghost who got accused of getting breast implants?

So rude. Everyone knows she’s got super-naturals.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A man saw a lady with big breasts. He asked, "Excuse me, can I bite your breasts for $1000?" She agrees, so they go to a secluded corner

She opens her blouse and the man puts his face in her breasts for 10 minutes." Eventually the lady asks, "Aren't you gonna bite them?"

He replies, "No, it's too expensive."

My friend confided in me that she has breast cancer.

I asked her if she had anything else she wanted to get off her chest.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

It’s easy to tell how big a woman’s breasts are, but now it’s even easier to see the biggest dick

They’re the one not wearing a mask

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

This girl sometimes swaps out her bra for her huge pet snake to cover her breasts

It's a cobra

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Try to imagine a woman with six pairs of breasts.

Looks good, dozen tit?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A history professor is lecturing his class on changing beauty standards. He shows his class a black-and-white picture of a woman who is 4'10" and has very small breasts.

"This woman won several beauty pageants in the 1930s," says the professor. "Do you think she'd do very well in a beauty pageant today?"

"Definitely not," says one of the students.

"What makes you say that?" implores the prof.

"Well," says the student, "she's very, very old today...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A cowboy walks into a bar.

He tips his hat to the bartender and sits at a booth in the corner.

A minute later, a priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk in and sit at a table.

Thirty seconds pass and a nun with a bullwhip leads an alligator on a leash to the cowboy’s booth.

Less than a minute goes by and a m...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Did you hear the one about the breast cancer survivor who got a tattoo??

It was a real tit for tat scenario.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A boy and a girl are romanticaly sitting in the park

Suddenly she loosens her blouse and while looking the boy in the eyes she asks: "do you want to know where they did surgery on my hart?"
The boy, being flabbergasted by this stutters a bit and then brings out: "yes... Yes please!" While looking greedily at her breasts.
The girl, happy with thi...

My blonde friend got breast implants

I used to call her " little Connie", now she's just "Silicone"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I had a dream that my wife's breasts were made from solid mahogany.

That would be wierd, wooden tit?

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What do you call an Egyptian matriarch with small breasts?

Nevertiti

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's it called when a teenager going through puberty, can't stop looking at breasts

An eye-dem-titty crisis

An old woman goes to her family doctor

She does not want to live anymore: "Doctor, I can't go on any longer, I don't want to go on, I am tired of my life... I would do something ...but I don't even know where my heart is".
Doctor: "Two fingers under the left breast".
Two days later she shot herself in the left knee.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A lady comes home from her doctor's appointment grinning from ear to ear. Her husband asks, "Why are you so happy?"

The wife says, "The doctor told me that for a forty-five-year-old woman, I have the breasts of an eighteen-year-old." "Oh yeah?" quipped her husband, "What did he say about your forty-five-year-old ass?" She said, "Your name never came up in the conversation."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Blonde

A blonde is walking down the street. One of her breasts popped out of her blouse. Everyone gasped and gasped, and only one policeman found the courage to tell her:
- Citizen, why are you in such a public place !?
She looks at her breast and exclaims:
"Horror!" I forgot my child on the...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Science has found that honeybee venom helps kill aggressive breast cancer cells.

They've updated their name reflecting their new job to Boobees.

I almost failed my breast exam...

but I got 2 D's.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Dolly Parton and Princess Diana pass away on the same day.

They arrive at the pearly gates at the very same time.

Saint Peter is waiting in judgment. With both women vying for entry, St. Peter announces, “Ladies, I only have one more space in Heaven today. You’ll have to prove you’re worthy.”

Dolly Parton laughs and says “No problem, Pete!” ...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Me: *stares at medusa's breasts.* Medusa: "My eyes are up here."

Me after looking: *gets rock hard*

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.