What's a suicide bombers worst fear?

Dying alone...

Q: Where do suicide bombers go after they die?

A: Everywhere

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Why aren't there Christian suicide bombers?

Because they understand with 20 virgins come 20 mother in law's

I'm not worried about Muslim suicide bombers. They can only attack once.

*Hindu* suicide bombers on the other hand...

The last batch of suicide bombers were very tight knit.

They used to sing together, dance together, laugh together. True brethren. At the end they had a blast doing their job.

Its not the Islamic suicide bombers you need to worry about...

Its the Buddhist ones - they keep coming back!

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Kim Jong Un was sitting in his office wondering whom to irritate next when his telephone rang.

"Hallo, Mr. Kim!", a heavily accented voice said. "This is Paddy down at the Harp Pub in County Sligo, Ireland. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!"

"Well, Paddy," Kim replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is your army?"

"Right now," said ...

A World War II pilot is reminiscing before school children about his days in the air force.

"In 1942," he says, "the situation was really tough. The Germans had a very strong air force. I remember, " he continues, "one day I was protecting the bombers and suddenly, out of the clouds, these fokkers appeared."

At this point, several of the children giggle.

"I looked up, and rig...

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A world war 2 fighter pilot is giving a talk to a group of school children about the Battle of Britain

An RAF veteran from the free Polish forces is giving a talk to a class of young school children and was trying to explain what the battle of Britain was like.

" Out of the blue we were attacked by a bunch of Fokkers. There were about 20 of these Fokkers. One took out my buddy, but I managed ...

A suicide bombers last day on the job...

is also his best day on the job.

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10 ISIS suicide bombers decided to blow up a building

"We must pick a building that will have a mass effect on western culture" the leader says. So they research all the popular websites they can find and have decided on the reddit headquarters.

"YES!!" Another exclaimed! "We can not only dismantle their social construct but we can all attack ...

What do college students and suicide bombers have in common?

It's impossible to find either with any experience.

What do Suicide Bombers and people with Tourette’s Syndrome have in common?

They both tic.

What did the suicide bombers son say when his son went off to an American college?

They blow up so quickly...

What was the last thing that went through a suicide bombers head?

His foot.

My father was an Allied war hero. He single-handedly destroyed 4 Messerschmitts, 9 Heinkel bombers, and 11 Stuka dive bombers.

He was the worst mechanic the Luftwaffe ever had.

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Muslim suicide bombers in Britain are set to begin a three-week strike on Wednesday in a dispute over the number of virgins they are entitled to in the afterlife

Emergency talks with Al Qaeda have so far failed to produce an agreement.


The unrest began last Tuesday, when Al Qaeda announced that the number of virgins a suicide bomber would receive after his death, would be cut by 25% this February from 72 to 54. A spokesman said increases in rec...

Suicide Bombers don’t like to be called explosives

They self identify as fireworks

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Why do you never see Old Suicide Bombers, after all they have less to loose?

Because A man who hasn't had a hard on in 10 years, has no use for 72 virgins.

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Why are there no female suicide bombers?

Good luck convincing a girl by telling her if she do it, she will meet 70 virgins in heaven.

I don’t get why more people don’t become suicide bombers

I mean, you have guaranteed job security for the rest of your life!

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What did the boston marathon bombers accomplish that hitler could not?

They ended a race...

Sometimes I wonder about suicide bombers...

What makes them *tick*?

Why is it easy to defeat an army of suicide bombers?

There are no experienced ones

Suicide bombers are almost nervous...

Because it's always their first time.

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