UPJOKE
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It's only kamikaze if it came from the Kamikaze region in Japan...

Otherwise it's just plane suicide.

What did the kamikaze flight instructor tell his students?

I'm only gonna show you this once

My father was a kamikaze pilot in his youth

Not a very successful one, obviously.

What did the instructor at the school for Kamikaze pilots say to his students?

Watch closely. I’m only going to do this once.

Why were kamikaze flyers a bad weapon?

Because all the good ones died in practice.

Kamikaze pilots had a lot of potential.

But it turned out they were all one hit wonders.

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Japan's worst kamikaze pilot

He flew over 25 missions

Kamikaze

It's a dying art

A Kamikaze pilot is teaching a bunch of students and he says...

“Look carefully I’m only going to do this once”

Why are Kamikaze pilots so easy to train?

They only need to learn how to take off.

A kamikaze teacher explains to his students:

Students pay attention I will show you once.

A Kamikaze pilot spoke with his instructor...

"I keep missing the ships, I need some help!"

And the instructor said, "OK fine, I'll show you how, but I'm only going to do this once..."

I failed my job interview as a Kamikaze pilot today.

I probably shouldn't have asked for a pension.

I learnt a boring fact about Kamikaze

Its just plain suicide

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My historian friend was telling me about how the Japanese would kamikaze when all else failed.

That's just plane suicide

Did you hear the one about the suicidal kamikaze pilot?

Talk about work-life balance

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What happens when a kamikaze bomber blows up a chocolate peanut butter cup factory?

Reeses pieces

What’s the prerequisite for becoming a kamikaze pilot?

A fear of ejection.

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I went for a Chinese last night and got chatting to the waiter.

He told me he lived in Japan during the war and was a Kamikaze pilot and his Code Name was 'Chow Mein'. I said "correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't Kamikaze pilots sacrifice their own lives?"

To which he replied, "Yes but I was Chicken Chow Mein."....

What’s the last big mystery from WW2?

Why kamikaze pilots wore helmets

Why was the kamikaze pilot so depressed?

He felt his life was heading for a downward spiral.

How do you divide by Zero?

By becoming a kamikaze and splitting a ship in half

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Why, what, who?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard when he lives in the jungle without a razor?
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they know there is not enough?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Why does...

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Japanese Banking Crisis

Uncertainty has hit the Japanese banking industry.


In the past week, Origami bank has folded, Sumo bank has gone belly up and Bonsai bank announced plans to cut some of its branches.


Last week it was announced that Karaoke bank is up for sale and will likely go for a song w...

My grandfather was in the air force in the Second World War, surviving over 30 combat missions in hostile airspace.

He was by far the worst pilot of the entire Kamikaze corps.

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Did you hear about the Jewish kamikaze pilot?

He crashed his plane onto his brothers scrap metal yard.

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A bird in hand.....

So there was this farmer, his son, and the only animal on their farm that survived the winter: a duck.

One day, a farmer is sits down to pay some bills, when he realizes he's falling short of some money. Racking his brain for a bit, he finally decides to sell of the family's last duck, in ex...

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