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Blueprint Jokes

If a dyslexic doesn't understand a Korean blueprint,

Would they say instructions nuclear?

My boss gave me a blueprint to trace...

My job was on the line

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Bob and bill are looking over the star destroyer blueprints

"Hey bob, do we need any turrets on the bottom half of this Star Destroyer?"

"What d'you mean Bill?"

"The bottom half. It looks like we have about a dozen of these massive building-sized rotating double-barreled turrets on the top half, but pretty much nothing on the bottom half."
<...

Did you hear about the blueprints for Giza?

Don’t trust them. All looks like one big pyramid scheme to me.

What do you call an adult female chicken that likes to draft blueprints?

A Hen-gineer

I got expelled for making blueprints for a water slide that goes up one side of my university and down the other.

Maybe I shouldn't have started by saying that I wanted to chute up the school.

How often did the architect have to put long narrow paths in his blueprints?

Hallways

What did the telecommunications infrastructure company director say in response to requests to alter his company's 5G network blueprint from government officials in order to satisfy privacy concerns?

It's my way or the Huawei

Why did the architect take so long to get started on his church blueprints?

He couldn't decide what font to use.

How can we confuse the Chinese Government?

Make our military blueprints in the form of Ikea instructions.

In the year 2010, the Lord came unto Noah and said:

“Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flash before me.
Build another Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have 6 months to build the Ark before I will start the unending...

How do you know if your house was burgled by smurfs?

Look for blueprints

A thief stole a leaky tin of paint and is well hidden in the mall...

The police found him by following the blueprints.

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