UPJOKE
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When do Americans and the rest of the world reach consensus?

When it's -40°.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Physicians were unable to reach a consensus:

Should Brexit take place?

The Allergists were in favor of scratching it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologist's had sort of a gut feeling about it,

but the Neurologists thought May had a lot of nerve.

Meanwhile, Obstetrician...

What happened when Caesar's government officials could not reach consensus?

Irritable Brawls in Rome

Scientists are working on new solar energy panels.

They want a material that absorbs and releases the most radiating heat. The consensus is car seats.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

An academic from Oxford University is writing a paper on sheep shagging technique.

Having no personal experience on the subject, he decides to travel across the country and interview farmers from different regions to find out how they shag their sheep.

First, he visits a farmer in Scotland and asks him what his sheep shagging technique is.

“Well laddy, after grabbi...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A U.S. Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to his staff..

A U.S. Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to his staff.

While waiting for the coffee machine to finish brewing, the Colonel decided
to pose a question to all assembled.

He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he
failed to get his ...

What do you call a headcount of the prison population?

A consensus.

Why did Simba's dad die in a stampede?

Because he didn't Moofassa enough!

The other day I found a little dog in Queens

It looked like it was starving and cold so I decided to take it home

It was a tiny little puppy and was filthy so I couldn’t really tell what kind of dog it was and decided to ask around

I first went to my friend from the Bronx

He said “that’s not a dog just one of those baby ra...

When I was in the army our commanding officer always made decisions based on the way our whole unit felt.

I kind of miss him. Good ol' General Consensus.

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