UPJOKE
pastadumplingspotatoricottapolentaspinachraviolipestolasagnafrittatadoughsemolinamacaronisupermarketsalad

Why couldn't the Italian get into his house?

He had gnocchi
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Why are Italians always locked out of their houses when they get home?

Gnocchi
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I told my mom I wanted to have a potato pasta for dinner. Her response?

Gnocchi dokey.
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My friend promised he would hide a key to my cell in the noodles of my final meal.

When the guard went away I looked but there was gnocchi.
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Why was the Italian locked out after dinner?

because he had 'gnocchi'
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Why wouldn’t the Italian chef’s car start?

Because he had gnocchis.
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My Italian friend works part-time as a chef and part-time as a comedian.

I'm sick of hearing his gnocchi gnocchi jokes.
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This is probably the worst joke that I -a dad - ever told. But it still made my daughter laugh.

My wife, teenage daughter and I are sitting in a restaurant discussing Italian cuisine.

Wife: There's nothing better than fresh gnocchi.

Me: There's nothing better than getting fresh and gnocching someone up.
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How did the pasta chef get locked out of his house?

He came home from work with gnocchi.
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I had some lasagne in the freezer that I planned on eating but I realized it was locked

And I had gnocchi
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Why couldn't the Italian guy open the lock?

Gnocchi
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The anti-phonetic alphabet

I've been making a list for months of words that can be used to deliberately confuse people over the phone when phonetically reading out letters. Some letters like L are tough so I just added funny words to say.

A - aisle

B - bdellium

C - czar

D - Djibouti, Django, djemb...
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What's a locksmith's favorite pasta?

Gnocchi
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Have you heard the one about the guy that got locked out of his house after having Italian for dinner?

He had gnocchi...


Credit: twitter user @Mostly_Cheese
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