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Anne Jokes

If Marie Antoinette, Anne Boleyn, Charles I, and Louis XVI formed a band, what would its name be?

The Talking Heads.

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Famed pirates Anne Bonny and Mary Read would board ships with their tits out to distract and intimidate enemy sailors.

It had no effect on their own crew because pirates only care about booty.

Too bad Anne Frank never watched Home Alone.

It could have been a real game changer.

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I've never understood how the Nazis couldn't find where Anne Frank was hiding

I've been to Amsterdam... There are signs pointing to her house everywhere.

William Shakespeare was married to a woman called Anne…

Anne hath a Will, Anne Hathaway.

Whats the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?

Harry survived the attic scene

When Anne has a will...

Anne Hathaway

What did Henry VIII say when Anne Boleyn cheated on him?

“So no head?”

Did you hear that Anne Heche had been working for a new start-up?

DoorBash. They guarantee to deliver your food straight into your house, piping-hot in 60 seconds or less.

Hello, I'm Amanda Laurie-Anne!

Mando: Hi. Me too.

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The lead actress in the local theatre production of the "Diary of Anne Frank" was so awful

That in the scene where the Nazi officer enters and shouts

" Where isth she ? "

"In the attic" shouted half of the audience

Anne is such a great actress.

You might say...she Hathaway with words.

I feel bad for Anne Frank

She had her diary published for all the world to read, which is every girl's worst nightmare!

And she didn't get paid for it, which is every Jew's worst nightmare.

Why Anne Frank didn't finish her diary

**Concentration problems**

What is Anne Franks favourite Anime?

Death Note

What’s the difference between Anne Frank and a Boy Scout?

A Boy Scout comes back from camp.

Anne Frank, Michael Jackson, and Helen Keller walk into a bar...

Just kidding they're all dead.

Q: Why was Raggedy Anne kicked out of the toy pen?

A: Because she kept sitting on Pinnochio's face saying, "Lie to me, lie to me!"

Ollie saw his mother naked one day

Ollie saw his mother naked one day and discovered that she didn’t have the same toolset down there that he did.

He asked his father about it and perhaps not being the best of fathers, his father answered: No she doesn’t have a pee-pee but sometimes I give her mine and she really likes it. ...

The Coronavirus is somewhat like The Diary of Anne Frank...

... but she had to stay inside to avoid Germans.

Anne Hathaway starts an acting class

The slogan: "Come learn to act the Anne Hatha-way"

A catholic priest was praying Saint Anne.

The devil appears: ”Whazzzzup homie, why you pronounce my name so funny?”

What's the difference between Harry Potter and Anne Frank?

Harry made it out of the chamber

My gf told me this joke, idk where she heard it

One day, a lady named Anne wanted to change her name...

One day, a lady named Anne decided she was bored of her name and wanted to change it to Penny-Anne. That's not what I would choose, I would do something cool like Proffeser Spider Ninja, but that's why I haven't changed my name. Anyway, changing your name can be like $200, and Anne didn't have a lot...

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[NSFW] My dick is like Anne Frank...

.... it's stowed away most of the time and only comes when German men are banging at my back door.

Anne Frank's famous last words.

Brb, door

What was the last line in Anne Frank's diary?

Just a moment, someone's knocking on the door..

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Anne Frank showed a cunning and resolve that any Jew would have been proud of.

Two years rent free.

What did the drummer call his triplets?

Anna One, Anna Two, Anne Three

I don't know why everyone had such a hard time finding Anne Frank.

When I went to Amsterdam, there was literally signs all over the place telling me where her house is.

Two pirates were aboard the Queen Anne's Revenge discussing the upcoming pirate captain's election

One says to the other: "Arrr matey, I'll give ye my clear glass eye if ye give me yer vote for captain tomorrow."

The other considers the proposal for a moment, then squeezes his fake wooden eye out of its socket, throws it overboard, spits on his hand and offers it to the first pirate.
...

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A bus full of catholic school girls gets in a horrible accident.

Sadly all on the bus perished and are waiting in line at the pearly gates. St Peter approaches the first girl in line.

"Mary Margaret, I have one question for you, and it is of the utmost importance that you answer truthfully. Have you ever touched a penis?"

Mary blushed a little bit...

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After the war, Anne Frank went on to become a very successful farmer. She became famous for producing all sorts of goods including milk, cheese, and the most amazing butter.

It was the Dairy of Anne Frank.

You know, I bet that actress from The Devil Wears Prada could do anything she puts her mind to.

Where Anne Hathawill,

Anne Hathaway.

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A catholic priest is praying

“...I pray you Saint Anne...”

Suddenly the devil appears: “Oh, it’s you again. For Pete’s sake stop calling me if you don’t mean it and at least pronounce my name right.”

The priest shouts: ”Go away satan.”

St. Anne appears: ”You want me to leave you? Gees, at least you could pr...

A man and his three beautiful daughters.

There once was a man living out in the countryside with his wife and his three beautiful daughters; Anne, Beth, and Claire. The man was very protective of his daughters, and when he learned that all three of them had fallen in love with three different men, he called the three men and said he wanted...

I was helping my grandpa fold some laundry yesterday and noticed something odd. On one shirt he had a silloutte of Sherlock Holmes, on another a picture of Harry Potter, on a third was printed an image of Frankenstein, and on a fourth, a girl who appeared to be Anne of Green Gables.

I asked my grandpa, "Are all these graphic shirts really yours?"

"Yes they are, " my grandpa replied sheepishly "I just can't resist buying novel tees."

Holocaust jokes aren't funny

Anne frankly, they need to stop

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Baby Skunk.

Dave and his wife, Anne, were driving home one very cold night in Wisconsin, when Anne yells at him to stop the car. Anne jumps out and picks up a little bundle that was laying in the road. She brings it back to the car and it turns out it was a baby skunk. It was barely alive, but very cold.
...

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A joke for the older generations

So there once was this women by the name of Marge, who could never seem to snag a man to stay by her side for more than a year! She had many husband and would bear many kids with each husband. By the end of her fertility period she had given birth to a 100 kids! In order to remember all their names ...

What do you title a book about a Jewish girl brought back to life?

The Diary of Anne Frankenstein

I don’t like holocaust jokes

Anne Frankley I won’t stand for them

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Nuns are renovating their monastery.

Sister Anne and Sister Margateth were assigned to paint the inner halls of the chapel.

Sister Anne: "Dear sister, shouldn't we take off our clothes so they won't catch any paint?"

Sister Margareth: "This is a good idea. Since we are sisters, the Lord shouldn't mind us seeing each other...

I might have to reconsider my kosher hot dog business...

For some reason Anne's Franks hasn't been very popular with the target audience.

Who's the best hide and go seek player

Anne Frank

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A white man was on holiday in Jamaica

The man had recently gotten a tattoo on his penis. When it stretched out, it would spell «Anne», but it only said «Ae» when flaccid.

One day after he and his wife were done at the beach, he went to the public showers and saw a Jamaican with the letters «Wy» on his schlong.

«Does it sp...

What do you call a women that works in telecommunications?

Anne Tenna

Does anyone know of any actors that can help cure my lisp?

I’m pretty sure Anne Hathaway, but I’m going to ask Colin Firth.

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Gadgets.

One day little Tim's teacher asked the class to bring a gadget from home and then each one would stand up in class and explain what it was.

Next day comes over and class begins.

First to go was Anne.

Teacher: What did you bring to class Anne?

Anne: I brought a kettle. I...

My buddy Frank is a HUGE fan of diarrhea. I was thinking of writing a book about him, but it looks like the title is already taken.

"The Diary of Anne Frank"

What is #2’s favorite book to read?

The diarrhea of Anne Frank

My second wife never really was on time for anything

She would just Anne Boleyn

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