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Pierre, the fighter pilot.

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful day and love is in the air.
Marie leans over to Pierre and says, "Pierre, kiss me!"
Pierre grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie's lips. "What ar...

Marie Antoinette was surprised when she found out how she was being executed

Her Face dropped

What killed Marie Curie?

Curieosity

Marie is a devout Christian

She gets married and, in the next years, has 12 kids. Shortly after her last child is born, her husband dies. A few months later she remarries and, over the following years, has another 15 kids. However, like her first husband, her second husband dies after her last child is born.

Refusing to...

Why did the cranky actress turn down the role of Marie Antoinette?

She was in no mood to do a period drama.

What is Marie Curie’s favorite food?

Fission chips.

What was Marie Antionette talking about?

What the hell is a "meat cake"?

Why Marie Curie won two Nobel Prizes?

Because she was very rad.

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The 3rd grade teacher was asking her students what they wanted to be when they grow up. It was Johnny's turn…

Johnny: I wanna be a billionaire and go to expensive clubs. Find a bitch there, buy her a million dollar apartment in Vegas.
Get her a Ferrari. Buy her a beach house in Miami , a jet to fly with, get her expensive jewelry and have sex with her 3 times a day
.
The teacher was lost of words a...

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So, apparently, Marie Antoinette was really good at oral sex...

In fact, the entire Third Estate wanted her head!

Marie was tired during scripture class

And she kept falling asleep at her desk, halfway through the class the teacher asked her a question, "Marie who is a lord above?" James her friend behind her notices she is asleep and with a pin pokes her. Suddenly she yelled "GOD!" as she is pricked by the sharp pin. "Very Good!" The teacher said.<...

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Little Billy and his class went on a field trip with Ms. Marie

On their way back, the bus broke down and on top of that there was a huge storm. There was no way they could make it back that day so they decided to stay in a motel nearby for the night. The children were fed and put to bed.

Little Billy came to Ms Marie and said he couldn't sleep and the o...

What is Marie Curie's favorite movie?

It's A Wonderful Half-Life

A bloke I work with says he's dating twins...

I asked him "How do you tell them apart?"
"That's easy..." he says "...Marie's got blonde hair and Brian's got a beard."

Why did Marie Antoinette travel the world?

Where else would she beheaded?

What do Marie Curies Notebooks and a defected KGB agent have in common?

They both won’t be investigated very closely.

What is the opposite of "Typhoid Mary"

Marie Cure-y

Fred and Marie are residents in a retirement home...

Marie says to Fred, "I bet I can guess how old you are."

"How are you gonna do that?" asks Fred.

"Well," says Marie, "You have to unzip your pants."

Fred is a little hesitant, but Marie assures him that there is nothing to fear. This method is quick and 100% accurate. So, Fred ...

In response to the invitation for a rather unusual REUNION of all time greats

* Newton said he'd drop in.
* Socrates said he'd think about it.
* Ohm resisted the idea.
* Boyle said he was under too much pressure.
* Darwin said he'd wait to see what evolved.
* Pierre and Marie Curie radiated enthusiasm.
* Volta was electrified at the prospect.
* Pavlov pos...

Little Johnny

"Hey, Mom," asked Johnny "Can you give me twenty dollars?"

"Certainly not."

"If you do," he went on, "I'll tell you what dad said to the maid when you were at the beauty shop."

His mother's ears perked up and, grabbing her purse, she handed over the money. "Well? What did he ...

Dear redditors,...

...one friend of mine bought a ticket to the European Cup of Football, in 10th of July, without realizing that it's going to be on the exact same date as his wedding.

If anyone is interested to go in his place...

... the wedding is in Lisbon Cathedral and the wife is called Mar...

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Two women meet over a coffee.

"Ah, Marie, I haven't seen you in years, what's going on in your life?"

"I have met a charming and well-off young man half my age."

"Majestic."

"Indeed. He took me to Paris, we dined in the finest restaurant, bought paintings from the vernissage!"

"Majestic!"

"Once...

Reason for Beer Money

Boudreaux's wife, Marie, told him that she was cutting back on his beer drinking because they just can't afford it.

He responded: "Hold up, I saw you spent 100 bucks for your haircut, 50 bucks on your nails, 75 bucks on your make up, and have a 70 dollar a month gym membership and you want ...

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A teacher asks Johnny, "what do you want to be when you grow up?"

"I want to be a billionaire, go to the most expensive club, take the best bitch, give her a Ferrari, an apartment in Copacabana, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe; an infinite Visa card, and make love to her three times a day."
The teacher, not knowing what to do with the bad be...

It keeps the hot things hot, and the cold things cold

One morning, Boudreaux pulled up to Thibodeaux's house to give him a ride to work. As Thibodeaux got in the rusted, beat up truck he noticed Boudreaux's Thermos on the seat between them.

*"What's dat?"*, he asked, pointing at the Thermos.

*"Oh, dat der's a 'termos I gots at da Walmarts...

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