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Marie Jokes

If Marie Antoinette, Anne Boleyn, Charles I, and Louis XVI formed a band, what would its name be?

The Talking Heads.

What's the difference between Mariah Carey and Marie Curie?

One glitters, the other glows

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I am Pierre

Pierre, a brave French fighter pilot, takes his girlfriend, Marie, out for a pleasant little picnic by the River Seine. It's a beautiful day and love is in the air.

Marie leans over to Pierre and says, "Pierre, kiss me!"

Pierre grabs a bottle of Merlot and splashes it on Marie's lips...

What did Lisa Marie say to Michael Jackson when she wasn't in the mood?

Just beat it.

what do Marie Kondo and Captain Kirk have in common?

They both love saving space

My grandpa once told me he dated Marie Curie.

He was attracted to her glowing spirit and radiant personality.

Sadly, their relationship became toxic.

Did you hear about Marie Kondo’s latest book on organizing closets?

It’s called Hanger Management

There’s a new movie out about Marie Curie.

It received glowing reviews.

Marie Curie is my favorite scientist of all time.

She was absolutely radiant.

364 days of the year I agree with Marie Antoinette

But today, let them vote cake.

Marie-Antoinette heard of the starving karma farmers of reddit

“Let them have cake day”

Marie Antoinette could have avoided the French Revolution

Marie Antoinette could have avoided the French Revolution simply by issuing an edict the distribute bread among the poor.
However, she didn’t do that because you can’t have your cake and edict too.

To think, Louis and Marie-Antoinette almost won the French Revolution.

They were neck and neck.

One thing that you shouldn't say to Marie Antoinette

You left my head hanging in shame

Why couldn't Marie-Antoinette finish her last words?

She got cut off.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

I met a woman named Marie Callender

Now I'm a pisexual.

I know, I know....

What does Marie Antoinette and me have in common?

It is likely at one point on December the 16th over the years, we have enjoyed a cake day.

Marie Kondo says to donate anything that doesn't spark joy,

but The Salvation Army says that amounts to human trafficking.

How are Marie Antoinette, Princess Peach, and GLaDOS alike?

They all lie about there being cake.

Marie Curie was a brilliant physicist but Einstein was exponentially smarter than her.

E = M.C.²

What did Marie Antoinette say on my Reddit anniversary?

Let them eat cake day!

What is Marie Curie’s favorite food?

Fission chips.

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