Accounting Jokes - 17 Hilarious Accounting Jokes

Accounting Joke (from my professor)

A priest, a lawyer, and an accountant were all at the bedside of a very ill man. The man said to them,

"Gentlemen, I'm dying. Before I go, however, I want to ask you one final favor: My family is rotten and I don't want to give any of them an inheritance. I would like to be buried with the r...

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Do you smoke?

Lady: Do you smoke?

Guy: Yes I do.

Lady: How many packs a day?

Guy: 3 packs.

Lady: How much per pack?

Guy: $10.00 per pack.

Lady: And how long have you been smoking?

Guy: 15 years

Lady: So 1 pack is $10.00 and you have been smoking 3 packs a da...

Have you heard they’ve banned accounting in Afghanistan??

Apparently there’s a Tally Ban.

Accounting is hard

I guess you could say its mentally taxing

What's accounting?

Something Italians learn in preschool.

What's the difference between Counting and Accounting?

**Counting:** *One, Two, Three, Four, Five...*

**Accounting:** *Ah-One, Ah-Two, Ah-Three, Ah-Four, Ah-Five...*

My go-to accounting joke

(Acknowledgement: This joke came from the Drew Carey show. I don't remember specifically which episode. I don't even know why I was watching it.)

The owners of a micro-brewery are sitting around a table having their monthly board meeting.

The accountant stands up and says "So, let's ...

There was once, in a small town, a man named Don.

One day Don was walking on top of a fence, and he slipped. When he slipped, the fence split him in half, right up the middle, but miraculously, each half of Don survived! Each half got up, started hopping away, and essentially started living separate lives.

The left half, more prone to rati...

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A bus stops... [NSFW]

and two Italian men get on. They sit down and engage in an
animated conversation. The lady sitting next to them ignores them at first, but her attention is galvanized when she hears one of them say the following:

"Emma come first. Den I come. Den two asses come together. I come once-a-mor...

Accounting Joke

Hey Guys

Need a good accounting related joke for work, if anyone has any good ones please share

Did you hear about the discerning entomologist with a degree in accounting?

He was into fine-ants.

My Accounting Teacher Told Us This One Today

If your debits and credits don't equal, then your assets in jail.

Big Burly Biker walks into a bar

He sees this tiny nerdy looking guy staring at his filled drink and decides he wants to mess with him. The Biker walks over takes the glass and slams the drink in one swig. At this the nerdy guy just starts bawling like a baby.

The Biker filled with remorse tells him to calm down an...

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An Italian guy, a Polish guy, and a Japanese guy all apply for a job at an office.

The manager hires all three and tells the Italian, "Ok, you take care of the inventory". Tells the Polish guy, "You take care of accounting" and tells the Japanese guy, "You take care of supplies."

The manager comes back after an hour and sees the Italian guy and the Polish guy working,...

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I stormed into my boss's office and demanded to know why I had been overlooked for the position of Head of Accounting..

He replied, "Because you're the fucking janitor, Steve."

Accounting Joke: Why did the accountant cross the road?

Because that's what they did last year.

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Gus the Accountant

Gus has been doing accountancy for like 35 years and he's sick of it.

So Gus decides he wants some adventure in his life, so he's going to become a prospector.

Everyday he studies geology, he learns how to drive a big truck and operate an excavator and he starts selling up everything h...

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