Can we ban the “yo momma” jokes from this sub? They’re old, stupid and have been used by everyone hundreds of times.

Just like yo momma.

Yo mamas so ugly

Her portraits hang themselves

Yo momma is so ugly

Your dad wakes up with morning wouldn’t

Yo mama so ugly

She entered a Miss America pageant and nearly lost her citizenship.

Yo mama's so fat...

...whales harpooned her.

Yo momma’s so fat...

She slept on a memory foam mattress and it never forgot.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo momma's so fat

When she gives a blowjob it is classified as a class 5 hurricane.

Yo mamma so slow

It took her 9 months to come up with a good joke

Yo mama so old,

She goes on carbon dates.

Yo Mama so fat

I took a picture of her last Christmas and it's still printing.

Yo mama so fat

she looked at the menu and said OK

Yo Mamma So Stupid

She thought Chicken Stock was KFC's share market

Yo mama so broke,

she can only afford 'Delta' variant.

Yo mama's so fat

when she fell I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

Yo mama's teeth are so yellow...

She stood on a street corner and smiled, and traffic slowed down

Yo momma so dumb

She brought a spoon to the Super Bowl

Yo momma's so fat that objects 5 meters away accelerate at 1 m/s^2 toward her. What is yo momma's mass if G = 6.67x10^-11Nm^2/kg^2?

Please, someone help me, I can't solve it and it's making me nuts.

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A Redditor told me “Yo momma’s so dumb that she doesn’t get most of the content on r/jokes.”

“Oh yeah?” I said, “well, yo momma’s so dumb that she doesn’t get *any* of the content on r/all.”

I wanted to come back with something original, but all I could muster was a shitty riposte.

What do your mom and yo mama jokes have in common?

They're both getting old but are still enjoyed by many.

Yo mamma's so fat

They had to take her passport photo with Google earth.

Yo mama so fat

That when her underwear got dirty and she went to the laundromat, they told her that they don’t accept parachutes

Yo mamma so ugly...

The whole world faked a virus just to get a mask on her face.

5 yo: Can you count backwards from infinity?

Me: Of course I can but it will take forever.

Yo mama is so fat

That when she jumped the fossils started screaming

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama so ugly

when she gives head, it counts as anal.

Yo mama so fat it's hilarious

I'm not laughing but the floor is cracking up

Yo Mama so fat,

that she should be concerned because obesity is a huge problem

Yo mama is so ugly

Yo mama is so ugly she tried to enter an ugly contest, but they said, "Sorry, no professionals."

Best YO MAMA JOKE ACCORDING TO ME

yo mama is so stupid that she went for an archery contest and aimed for the ground and missed

Yo momma so fat..

She got triabetes.

Yo mama so fat

>!We’re genuinely worried about her. That kind of lifestyle is unhealthy. You should encourage her to walk more and lay off the Ben&Jerry’s.!<

Yo momma is so stupid

She studied for a drug test

Yo mamma so fat

When she steps on a scale I see my phone number

Yo mama's so ugly

She went to a haunted house and came out with a job application

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They don't have "yo mamma" jokes in Japan.

They have "umami" jokes!

Yo Cardi B! What's your favourite shade of yellow?

Okurr!

Yo mamma so fat

Yo momma so fat, clumsy and stupid, on her way to Wal-Mart she tripped over kmart and fell on target.

Yo mamma so ugly

The CDC recommends she continue to wear a mask after the pandemic is over.

Yo mama so stupid, her password requirement needed to be 8 characters long so she typed in

"Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs".

Yo mama's teeth are so bad

That when she smiled to the cashier at walmart, the barcode scanner picked it up as a set of saucepans

Yo mama so fat...

...when she goes camping the bears hide their food.

Yo mama so ugly...

The beggar gave her money to get a surgery.

Yo momma so old...

She pre-ordered the bible

A soldier shows up for military training, but realizes he forgot to bring his gun.

The sergeant hands him a stick and gestures to the training field.

"You'll have to use this, soldier. If you need to shoot someone, just aim your stick at them and shout 'Bangity bang-bang'. If someone gets too close to you, poke them in the gut with it as though it was a bayonette and shout ...

Yo mama so fat...

She uses DHL instead of UberEats.

Nsfw YO MAMA....

Your mama’s hoochie is so big...




...hold on, I’m losing my signal in here...

Stuttering Bible Salesman

A pastor concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed.

So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who wo...

Yo mama is so fat

She went out in high heels, and came back in flip flops

Yo mama so fat...

it took Nationwide 3 years to get on her side.

Yo momma's so fat

She has to use a boomerang to get her belt on

Yo momma so fat...

There wasn’t enough room for a punchline

Yo mama so fat she doesn't need the internet.

She’s already world-wide.

Yo Mama so stupid...

...she was yelling into the mailbox. When I asked her what she was doing she said she was sending a voice-mail.

Yo mumma’s so fat

The ocean beaches on her.

Yo momma so fat

when the lord said "let there be light" he had to ask her to move first

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama so fat

The strip club calls her Hitler after all the damage she's done to the poles.

Yo momma so ugly...

We’re gonna lie to her that the pandemic isn’t over so she can keep her mask on.

Yo mama’s so stupid...

She cried onto a ketchup packet because it said “tear here.”

How do yo get a farm girl to like you?

A tractor

Yo mama is the greatest comedian in the world!

Because she delivered the greatest joke ever.

Yo momma is so lazy...

Yo momma is so lazy that when she died and went to heaven, god told her to climb the stairway to enter and she said no.
So then god sent her to hell.

--

My younger son is on a yo momma joke kick right now in life and said this one to me in the car. I know it's a terrible yo momma ...

Yo mama got so fat

She is now forever banned from hitching a ride to the Mediterranean on the #EverGiven

Biden and Barack don't tell each other "yo mama" jokes...

they tell each other Jo 'Bama jokes.



(I'm sorry, it's terrible)

[using Ouija board] "yo Brad, can you hear us?"

[Brad responding...]


*W*

*W*

*A*

*A*

*A*

*A*

*A*

*A*

*Z*

*Z*

*Z*

...
#
“this is gonna take a while, Brad died in 1999.”

Yo momma so short...

You can see her feet on her driver's license

Yo momma so fat...

She is considered a carbohydrate based life form.

Yo mama...

Yo mama so big that Thanos had to snap twice.

This may be a repost but my daughter just thought of it after watching Avengers Endgame.
I giggled.

Joe the Carpenter

Joe was a simple and serious man. He was a carpenter in a small village named Arge Oaks where he owned the store "Joe's Carpentry."

For years Joe impressed his fellow neighbors with the highest quality carpentry work. Some people in town complained he was a bit too expensive, but no one ever...

What's the similarity between my jokes and yo mama?

They never get hot

Son: "Daddy i i fell in love and want to date this awesome girl!! "

Father : "That's great son. Who is she?"

Son: "It's Tina, the neighbor's daughter".

Father : "Ohhh I wish you hadn't said that.I have to tell u something son, but you must promise not to tell your mother.Tina is actually your sister."

The boy is naturally bummed out, but a coupl...

I would make a joke about how yo mama so fat...

But we shouldn't talk about the elephant in the room.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

In Texas, close to the border with Mexico, there was a priest who hated Mexicans

That Sunday, after reading the Bible, the priest started his sermon:

"Today we'll reflect on Peter's lie about being a follower of Jesus. That night, Peter acted as a coward and a liar, just like these damn Mexicans we see every day in this town!"

The whole congregation started to shou...

Yo momma so stupid,

she uses an emery board to file her taxes.

Yo mama so fat...

When she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.


Gimme your best yo mama jokes.

Around 50 million years ago, whales lived on land. Until some of them decided to go back to the sea.

The rest of them stayed on land and became yo mumma

Yo mama so dumb

She thought her indigestion was lactose intolerance living in the milky way.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The redneck farmer was disturbed ,,,

The redneck farmer was disturbed when he found out his son was masturbating several times a day out in the barn. "Boy, you gotta quit that! Go out and git yo'self a wife." So the boy went out and found himself a pretty young girl, to whom he got married. But a week or so after the wedding, the farme...

Yo mama

Yo mama so fat, she went to a weight lifting competition and won 1st place for standing up

Yo momma so fat, her chin is like a forehead for her neck.

As above

Yo mamma's so fat that...

...when she got covid the CDC classified it a super spreader event.

Yo mama so ugly, when she was young,

her mama left her outside a store and got fined for littering.

Yo mama so fat, when she died, she broke the stairway to heaven.

And she cracked the highway to hell.

Yo mama so stupid

She wears a face mask on a zoom meeting

Yo Mama so fat

I swerved to avoid her in the road and ran out of gas

A man walks into an unemployment office looking for a job.

He says to the unemployment worker: "I would like a job where I just sit at a desk and tell people they can't do the things they want yo do."

The unemployment worker answers: "Sorry sir, but that kind of job doesn't exist."

"Yes! It's your job that I want."

Had a great time telling Yo Mama jokes with all my buddies last night.

She's got a great sense of humour.

A man got worms in his stomach

He went to all the doctors available but non could give him the proper treatment so he decided to go to some wise old man , the man told him " simple , go and buy the sweetest watermelon you can buy , cut it in half and sit on it , Naked . So the leader of the worms would go down to taste the waterm...

Yo mama so FAT

She can't store files larger than 4 GB.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Two guys are getting ready for a costume party...

But there's a catch: The host said they have to get dressed up as 'emotions.'

So the first guy goes home and sticks his dick in a pear.

The second guy goes home and sticks his dick in a big bowl of custard.

They show up at the party together and knock on the door. The host opens...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My doctor gave me 6 months, so I shot him.

## The judge gave me 60 years!


&nbsp;

&nbsp;

&nbsp;


### My (other) favorite one liners:

1. I’ve had amnesia for as long as I can remember.

1. What do you call a cheap circumcision? A ripoff.

1. French tanks have five rever...

Stand up Comedy on Star Trek

Yo mamma so fat… she tried to use the teleporter, but it ran out of atoms before she made it to the other side

Yo Mama jokes hit differently when you're Indian

Like are you dissing my mum or my uncle? I need clarity

Yo mama so thirsty

She climbed Mt. Dew.

-- my 9 year old

Yo mama’s so old....

she doesn’t have a number after her username.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo momma so stupid

she stuck a battery up her ass and said, "I GOT THE POWER!"

Yo mama so fat....

... she gave her memory-foam mattress to Goodwill and they sold it as a flying saucer.

People say I have the face of a 17 yo.

I keep telling them its 18 and they shouldn't be snooping in my freezer anyway.

Yo mama soooo fat

When she jumped into the pool, nasa found water on Mars.

Every “yo mamma” joke has been done thousands of time, by thousand of people.

Kinda like yo mamma.

Di‌‌d yo‌‌u kno‌‌w i‌‌f yo‌‌u hol‌‌d you‌‌r ea‌‌r u‌‌p to‌‌o ‌‌a stranger‌‌s leg

... yo‌‌u ca‌‌n actuall‌‌y hea‌‌r the‌‌m sa‌‌y "wha‌‌t th‌‌e fuc‌‌k ar‌‌e yo‌‌u doing?"

“Yo, throw me a McRib”

- McGod said as he made the first McWoman.

Yo mama so fat, the only way she gets clean

is during a meteor shower

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama's so fat

Her belly button was named 'The Mariana Trench'

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama so gap-toothed...

She can floss with a dick!

Yo momma so fat

Your father left the house just so he could be far enough to see her entirely.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

NFSW A young man had made up his mind to become a lumberjack. So he takes all his tree falling equipment to a lumberjack camp in Quebec.

On his first day he does very well. Keeping up with the other lumberjacks all day.

When the evening meal came, he joined the circle sitting around the campfire, eating the standard
woodsmen's fare; beans & black coffee.

Around the middle of their meal one of the largest lumberj...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo' mama is so fat

That she sends me nudes via torrent

Yo mama so fat. . .

I swerved my car to avoid hitting her and ran out of gas.

My 7/yo sister said this at the dinner table while me and my dad were talking: What did one paper say to the other?

Nothing. Paper doesn't talk. That's how I want you to be. Like paper.

Yo girl, are you a zero APR loan?

Because I don't really understand your terms and you keep saying you have no interest.

Yo momma is so ugly.....

Walmart started requiring her to wear a face mask 10 years before they even heard of coronavirus.

Yo Mamma’s so ugly...

She’s been inspiring others to practice social distancing her whole life!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo mama so fat...

...She been butt dialing people since the days of rotary phones!

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Yo guys, my dick was in somebody's mouth last night!

But my back really hurts now.

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