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Hither Jokes

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With a sultry look and come-hither eyes filled with passion, my girlfriend asked me if I wanted her to shave before we had sex for the first time. I rasped...

"No honey, your mustache looks fine to me."

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Jesus Christ is dying on the cross.....

His disciples are gathered around, crying. Peter looks up and notices that Jesus seems to be calling him, “Peter, come hither!”

Immediately Peter rushes over to the cross, only to be hit severely over the head by the roman guard. He gets on his feet again and wants to return to the other disc...

Scientists Play Hide-and-Seek

All the great scientists throughout history are brought together for a game of hide and seek. They draw straws and Einstein is "it" first. He starts counting back from 100 as all the other great minds run hither and thither looking to hide. Newton runs over to the bushes but Heisenberg is already ...

When Karl Marx was a young philosophy student, he took it upon himself to travel across the country to see the wide world and learn all that he could to develop his theories.

Hither and thither he would ride across the German countryside, in his little pony-cart pulled by a pair of strong, hardy donkeys, meeting people, studying their lives and professions, and seeking to understand the world.

A time came when he was high in the German mountains. Snow was thick ...

A Franciscan, a Dominican, and a Jesuit are killed in a car crash and go to heaven...

When they arrive at the pearly gates, St. Peter ushers them into God's throne room, where they patiently await a routine post-death judgement from Yahweh Himself. God walks into His room, and takes His seat at the throne. He then beckons to the Dominican:
 

*Son of St. Dominic, co...

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Robin Hood was dying

Robin Hood was dying. He had lived a great many years, and now he was old, grey, and bedridden. He put out messages for all his friends to see him; and so at the appointed hour, Maid Marian, Little John, Friar Tuck, and the rest of the Merry Men gathered in his bedchamber.

"Maid Marian, my l...

A curvy blonde walks into a drugstore

She asks the clerk, "Can you show me where the flashlight batteries are?".

The clerk says, "Sure." and wiggled his fingers at her in a come-hither gesture. "Come this way", he continued.

She replied "If I could come that way, I wouldn't need the flashlight batteries."

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Linsey Dawn's Double Gee's

Anyway I had this really bad dream that I was in a terrible car accident.

I awoke in the hospital and Linsey Dawn McKenzie was my Nurse, standing over me. OMG, those beautiful sexy eyes, her incredible GG+ rack spilling out of her bra, straining to come out of her crisp, white uniform, the br...

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Nipped In The Nuts

A man goes into the hospital for a vasectomy. Before the procedure, an extremely beautiful nurse comes in and takes his vitals, then tells him to take all of his clothes off. The man is going almost crazy with lust for this perfect specimen, in her tight white starched uniform, her come-hither smil...

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