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Wd Jokes

I just finished reading a book about the history of WD-40.

It was non friction.

Can anyone show me how to use WD-40?

I'm a bit rusty.

I'm writing a book about WD-40.

It's Non-Friction

My wd-40 can rusted.

It was irony.

If the air conditioning in your car dies, all you need is some WD-40.

Windows Down - 40mph

If the Americans took 40 attempts to get WD-40 recipe right

Then the Chinese did very well for getting Covid in 19

About a month before he died, my grandfather asked us to spray WD-40 all over his back.

After that, he went downhill fast.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A tribesmen goes to his local Witch Doctor

TM: "I have a problem, i think i have that HIV thing that the villagers keep talking about"

WD: "What makes you think that? pretty sure the only cases so far are from the monkeys"

TM: "Im sure of it"

WD: "OK, well you must have been eating the monkeys then, you know it's against...

A cannibal isn't feeling too great after dinner last night.

*Disclaimer: better when told, not written. Tell your friends!*

He pays a visit to his witch doctor.

WD: Describe what you ate last night?

C: He was wearing a thick brown robe, with a rope around his waist. He was a little plump around the middle and had a bald spot on the top o...

Banned

Seven wheelchair athletes have been banned from the Para-Olympics after they tested positive for WD-40.

I finally developed an arthritis soothing serum for my creaky bones!!!

I call it WD-Over40

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

AMAZING SIMPLE HOME REMEDIES (That Really Work!)

1. AVOID CUTTING YOURSELF WHEN SLICING VEGETABLES BY GETTING SOMEONE ELSE TO HOLD THE VEGETABLES WHILE YOU SLICE.

2. AVOID ARGUMENTS WITH THE FEMALES ABOUT LIFTING THE TOILET SEAT BY USING THE SINK.

3. FOR HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE SUFFERERS ~ SIMPLY CUT YOURSELF AND BLEED FOR A FEW MINUTES,...

What's a Paralympian's biggest fear?

Testing positive for WD-40.

What does the Doctor use to keep things running smoothly in the T.A.R.D.I.S?

WD-4D

A woman gives birth to triplets

She and her husband are trying to figure out why so many.

"It was probably that time we ran out of lubricant and we used 3-in-one oil instead." says the wife. "Good thing we didn't use WD-40."

The guy was sitting in the waiting room of the hospital after his wife

had gone into labour and the nurse walked out and said to him, "**Congratulations** sir, you're the new father of twins!"
.
The man replied, "How about that, I work for the Doublemint Chewing Gum Company." The man then followed the woman to his wife's room.
.
About an hour...

Lena & Ole start a family.

Lena & Ole start a family.

Late one night, Lena vakes Ole and says, I tink it's time!' So Ole fired up the Yohn Deere tractor and took her to the hospital to have their first baby.

She had a little boy, and the doctor looked over at Ole and said, 'A son! Ain't dat great!' Well, Ole...

3 aristocrats in the French Revolution

So during the reign of terror in the French Revolution, there was a line of aristocrats waiting to be executed by guillotine. Near the middle of the line, there was a clergyman, an artist, and an engineer.

The clergyman got up to the chopping block and said a short prayer, and miraculously w...

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