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Tarts Jokes

Why do we have Pop-Tarts and not Mom-Tarts?

Because of the Pastry-archy

Why are there pop tarts but not mom tarts?

Because of the Pastryarchy.

Why are there PopTarts but not MomTarts?

Because of the pastryarchy.

A young baker buys a shop

He is very excited as this is his first venture since qualifying. He sells ok on everyday items like bread, but runs into trouble with his 'special items'. One day he makes beautiful cakes, however his customers only want pastries that day. So the next day he makes pastries, but now they want muffin...

How did John Lennon like his Pop-Tarts?

Strawberry Filled Forever

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

Old Sven collapsed one chill November Saturday after chopping maple wood near his house in the birch forest, five miles outside of Eagle River, Wisconsin.

He arose, sauntered home and changed into his flannel, tractor-print pajamas. It grew quiet and his breathing became labored. So, Sven lay down on the plaid-quilted single bed in the green guest room. His wife, Lena, tended to his care. He said nothing and sipped only a cup of water or two. On the e...

Ryu wanted to confess to his lady-crush Chun Li....

So he baked some white fudge treacle tarts and put them down on a table. Ken walked up and was like, "ooh, these tarts smell delicious" and he started to pick one up, when Ryu grabbed the whole plate and did a jumping-spinning kick at Ken while yelling "THESE TARTS AREN'T FOR YOU KEN!"

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A Woman goes to buy a Parrot. The prices are €200, €100, and €20. She asks why the last one is so cheap?

“Because he used to live in a brothel” says the shopkeep. She pays the €20.

When she gets home the parrot says “ me, a new brothel!” The woman laughs.

When the daughters get home the parrot says “ me, 2 new tarts!” The girls laugh too.

When the father finally gets home t...

What is Ben Sharpiro's favorite dessert?

Lib-tarts.

Why was the ninja so good at baking pastries?

Because he had a black belt in martial tarts.

Online dating is like a bakery

You've got the flakes, the fruitcakes, and the tarts.

What's the difference between a belly dancer and an incompetent pastry chef?

One shakes body parts and the other bakes shoddy tarts.

What do Disney and Kellogg's have in common?

They both make pop tarts.

If you give a man a fish he will eat for a day but...

if you teach a kid how to make pop tarts your job as a parent is pretty much done

A small boy has homework..

A small boy has a school home work question to answer, so he asks his father: "Hey Dad, what's the difference between 'theoretically' and 'realistically'?" His Dad thinks for a while and then says "Right-o son......go and ask your mother if she'd sleep with David Beckham for a million quid."

...

The New Market on the Corner

A new market opened up in Bill's neighborhood, so he decided to go down and see what they had for sale.

Inside appeared to be different produce stands, but, strangely, all he saw were bakery stuffs on the shelves. One was covered in pies and labeled "Pineapple Pies - $2/lb." Another was cover...
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