What’s the difference between light and dark soy sauce?

I asked Alexa, what’s the difference between light and dark soy sauce?

Dark soy sauce is used in Chinese cooking to add colour and flavour to dishes. Light is an electromagnetic radiation within a certain portion of the electro magnetic spectrum.

Thanks Alexa - you’re not technically w...

Why is soy sauce forbidden in fights?

‘Cause you should never Kikkoman when he’s down.

I once asked a cheese maker if there was any way he could make me a block of cheddar using soy milk.

Hey said, "I'm sorry, but there's no whey."

A Spaniard is walking through a grocery store

He spies a carton on the shelf labeled "Soy Milk"

He smiles to himself and says softly "yes you are"

Soy Milk

me to my vegan friend: hey what are you drinking?

vegan friend: soy milk

me: hi milk, what are you drinking?

Boy: Dad, Do We Have Any Soy Milk?

Dad: Hola Milk, Soy Padre.

A band of Superheroes walk into a Gluten-free, Soy-Free, non-GMO, organic, fat-free restraunt....

Just Ice was served.

Soy ice cream

Because how else would vegans know what ice cream doesn't taste like?

I found out my husband got fired from his job today. In order to cheer him up I got him his favorite soy sauce.

He said to me

"Oh I see. Kikkoman when he's down, huh?"

If I have to hear any more jokes about soy sauce

I will Kikkoman!

Sorry, maybe I'll Shoyu a better joke Tamari.

What did the Chinese restaurant do when they ran out of soy sauce?

They cooked like there was no tamari.

My wife gave me some bad news today

"But," she said, "I bought your favorite soy sauce to help cheer you up."

"Great," I said. "Just Kikkoman when he's down, huh?"

I'm very soy for that pun. I'll just wok away now.

What's in common between the vibrator and soy

They both try to substitute meat

why did the soy based meat substitute cross the road?

to prove it wasn't chicken

Jose looked at a bottle of soy sauce

He said, "Yes you are"

A man told me his strength gains came from eating soy products.

After he said this I wasn't sure whether I thought more of him, or lecithin.

What does milk in Mexico say when meeting others?

Soy Milk

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

LPT: if you are lost in japan, ask for soy sauce

...it will shoyu the way

You're ready

A man is outside with his dad after his wife has given birth. "I'm tired." he says. "Hi tired, I'm dad." the dad responds. "Well dad, soy milk." Teary eyed, the dad puts his hand on his son's shoulder and says "You're ready". "No..." The son says looking at his father "I'm dad" and he walks back int...

-What are you drinking, son?

-Soy milk.

-Hola milk, soy tu padre.

Edit : Removed the "es" that was bothering everyone

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

How is soy and dildos similar?

They're both meat substitutes

How does a spanish condiment identify itself?

Soy sauce

So a lady with Parkinson's orders a grande decaf peppermint soy latte no whip

and I forgot to put the lid on.

What did the veggie burger say to the taco?

Yo soy burger

Spanish Dad Joke

A mexican father and son were at the mall and the son finally convinced his dad to try Chinese food.
"But it's so dry!" said the father.
"No it's not, they put lots of stuff on their plates," replied the son.
"Like what?" the father asked.
"Soy Sauce" he answered.
The fathe...

Two friends named Monty and Jason went to a movie theater. Monty went ahead to grab the tickets leaving Jason waiting behind.

While queuing for the tickets, Monty chats up the gentleman in front of him, "Hey, I'm Monty," he says. The gentleman amicably replies, "Hola, soy Santiago."

Hearing the man's response, Monty immediately runs away and returns alarmed to his friend, shouting, "There's a Spanish in queue Jason"...

Two old men are having an argument over which one of them has lived their life to it's fullest

The first man, old, wrinkled and his scalp topped with few white strains of hair, proclaims:
>"I have only been able to achieve my proud age of 98 through a steadily upheld 6 hour workout routine on a daily basis. I may have lost some time, but it was completely worth it."

The second m...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

The Mysterious Bottle of Ketchup

A man wants to throw a party, so he heads into a grocery store looking for supplies. He grabs a shopping cart and combs through the aisles, grabbing everything he could possibly need for the party.

He's about to head out and he does a final mental check of the things he needs. He realises he...

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A farmer was selling his peaches door to door.

A farmer was selling his peaches door to door.
He knocked on a door and a shapely 30-something woman dressed in a very sheer negligee answered the door. He raised his basket to show her the peaches and asked, "Would you like to buy some peaches?"
She pulled the top of the negligee to one s...

A Mexican goes into a Chinese restaurant

Looks at a bottle of soy sauce and says "yes, yes you are."

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

A priest, a vegan and an anti-vaxxer walk into a bar...

The priest says: “I’ll have a glass of water”.
The vegan says: “I want a glass of soy milk”.
The anti-vaxxer fucking dies.

A man tells his wife he’s not feeling well.

When she comes home from the grocery store, she brings him his favorite soy sauce to cheer him up. He says “Oh, I see, Kikkoman when he’s down”.

1/10 would not visit here again

Went to a restaurant downtown the other day. I ask the waiter for food, he said food only comes in sets of 10 dishes each. There are three main chefs there and the restaurant is peculiar because they all want to cook only their own set. So I decide to go to the restaurant once for each chef.

...

What music do vegan goths listen to?

Soy division

How does pizza sauce introduce itself at a fiesta?

Yo no soy marinara

My father teaches biology and Spanish..

Him: Ok, who can tell me what these are?

Me: (Raises hand) Soy Beans!

Him: Much gusto, Beans! Me llamo Dad.

A Bilingual mexican dad was getting ready for work...

...and saw his son eating some cereal, but instead of milk there was a strange milk-like substance that smelled funny.

Dad: "what've you got there, son?"

Son: "cereal with soy milk."

Dad: "Hola Milk, soy tu padre!"

Riddle me this

Which does not belong:

* Nipple clamps
* Soy
* Vibrator


Answer:
The nipple clamps, the other two are meat substitutes.

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