UPJOKE
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what do a vibrator and tofu have in common?

They are both meat substitutes

I was having lunch a few minutes ago and I realized tofu is overrated.

It’s just a curd to me.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What’s the difference between dildos and tofu?

I can put a dildo in my mouth without gagging.

"Make me one with everything,"

says the Buddhist to the tofu hot dog vendor.

Then, after getting his tofu hot dog, the Buddhist hands the vendor a $20 bill.

The vendor takes the money and begins helping the next customer.

The Buddhist looks puzzled and asks the vendor, "Where is my change?"

The vendor...

Little Ken Fok grew up working hard in his father’s restaurant in China

Every day before school he would get up at 6am and help prepare the dishes for that days lunch before coming home from school at 4pm to help with the evening shift by preparing and serving customers. He would make Spicy crab cakes, shredded pork and tofu. He would work until midnight and then repeat...

I have this horrible tofu joke I'm afraid to post...

It's really tasteless.

Why did the tofu cross the road?

To prove it wasn't chicken. >:|

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What's the difference between tofu and a dildo?

A dildo can be used in place of meat in a satisfactory manner.

The same can't be said about tofu.

What martial art is done using only your feet?

**Tofu**

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does tofu and a dildo have in common?

They’re both for fucking pussies.



(This post was for u/raynir44)

I heard that Hillary Clinton is actually made of tofu.

She's white, bland, uninspiring and not tasty unless dipped in melty cheese.

I like making jokes about vegetarians...

but never about tofu, that's just tasteless.

Vegans don't beat their meat

They beat their "0% dairy all organic tofu"

How did the vegetarian quit smoking?

He went cold tofu.

What form of deadly martial arts are soybeans trained in?

Tofu

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