Life is like a dog sled team.

If you're not the lead dog, the view is always the same.

a man brings his sled in for repairs...

... the repairman takes a quick look and says "it looks like you've blown a seal". the man hurriedly wipes his mouth and cries "no, no! i just ate ice-cream!"

An Iditerod racer took a sled dog to the vet. "He's acting very strange," said the dog owner. "He encourages the other dogs to hump him. Other than that, he's perfectly normal and a great musher. Should I be worried?"

"Not at all," said the vet. "He just identifies as female. What you have here is a Trans Siberian Husky."

Sled prices are too damn high

but you can find a good deal if you're willing toboggan.

I haven’t seen many kids sledding this winter

It’s really gone downhill

When Santa fell off the sled and broke his leg, he knew he would be well looked after

You see Santa had private elfcare.

Unfortunately a large population of the East Coast of the US are attaching sleds to their backs.

Now it's all going down hill rather quickly.

What do sled dogs eat?

Mush

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

My father ladies and gentlemen...

So, when we were younger we used to run a single line off the back of one of the snowmobiles, put a splitter on her with two lengths of ski rope about 25' long, gear up with helmets and suits, and throw two guys on on those flying saucers, (you know, like the ones on National Lampoon's Vacation) and...

Just went sledding for the first time

I liked it until I got on the sled. It was all down hill from there.

When I was kid, and we'd go sledding on a cold snowy day, Ya know how often I had to rub my hands together to stay warm?

Intermittenly.

What is Santa’s favorite band?

Sled Zeppelin

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An old man is stuck in the middle of a freezing blizard.

He is freezing, but not the least bit terrified. He has hope that he will be saved.

By now, they snow is at his ankles.

His hope comes along when he sees a dog sled. The driver of the sled says, "Need some help?"

"No," the old man says. "God will save me."

"If you say so...

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[NSF] "Take off my scarf!", she said.

So I took off her scarf.

"Take off my shirt!", she demanded. So I unbuttoned her shirt and took it off slowly.

"Take off my bra!", she said in a rough voice. I unlatched her bra gently, sliding it off of the arms.

"Now, take off my skirt!", she ordered. I calmly sled it off the...

Staking a claim

In 1897 a young man set out for adventure from the frontier city of Seattle. He'd risked his entire life savings to make the trek to the Yukon to prospect for gold.

He started his journey full of excitement and hope. he'd purchased his 2,000lbs of gear and supplies and two fine stock horses t...

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An old man stands in the middle of a snowstorm...

...the man was standing there for a little under ten minutes, and the snow is up to his ankles. A dog sled passes by him.

"Need a lift?" Asks the sled driver?

"No." The old man replies. "God will save me."

"If you say so." The driver mushes on.

After hour, the snow is no...

Actual Russian Joke

Four Russians were being pulled in a sleigh by a team of horses in the dead of winter when they noticed a pack of wolves had started chasing them and were slowly gaining.

They knew they needed to lighten the sled so they drew straws and the one with the shortest straw blessed Russia and leapt...

What are the four seasons called in New England?

Almost winter, Winter, Still winter, and 3 months of bad sledding.

A Man Was Lost In The Desert

A man was lost in the desert for days and days and days and was crawling on his hands and knees. He had heat stroke, sun stroke, everything stroke and in maybe a few minutes he would be dead.

In the distance he saw a mirage, he thought. He saw someone coming towards him but he hadn't seen an...

A car carrying 3 men broke down in the middle of a desert...

"Let's each take a part and try to make it back to civilization." One of them suggested. They all agreed it was a good idea.

"I'll take the hood," said the first, "This way if I find myself atop a hill, I can slide down quickly, like a sled."

"I'll take the wheels," said the second, ...

A SEAL and his Sculpture

There was a Navy SEAL living undercover in the depths of Eastern Russia where they regularly hold ice sculpting competitions. He had been there for a while and was longing to liven up his stay there so he decided to enter the next one. There was a shop in town that he could buy sculpting supplies fr...

Santa's annual check ride

As the sled rotated off the runway, the examiner pulled a double-barreled shotgun from under his cloak and blasted one of the raindeer. He then turned to the perplexed Santa and said "Engine failure on take-off!"

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A North Pole story of Christmas traditions

It was not shaping up to be a Merry Christmas at the North Pole. Mr. Claus was buttoning his suspenders when an angel popped in out of nowhere, yelling "HEY SANTA!". That caused his fingers to lose grip, and the whole thing snapped him in the eye.

When he got out to the elves, they were all g...

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