There's this old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery.
One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, "If I hear that word one more time, I'll quit!"
Everyone liked him, so they came up with a code word. Someone who had committed adultery would say they had "fallen." This seemed to satisfy the old priest and things went well, until the priest died at ...
The local priest is tired of people telling him they cheated in confession
One Sunday near the end of mass he tells his congregation that he doesn’t like hearing people are cheating. He tells the church from now on refer to cheating as “slipping” in confession.
This goes on all spring and summer and when winter comes around the priest decided to retire. He forgot to...
A passerby noticed a couple of city workers working along the city sidewalks.....
He was quite impressed with their hard work, but couldn't understand what they were doing.
Finally, he approached the workers and asked, "I'm really impressed and appreciate how hard you're both working, but what the heck are you doing? It seems that one of you keeps digging holes, and then...
can we give a shout out to sidewalks?
Cuz' they really helped to keep me off the streets
I really owe a lot to sidewalks.
They've been keeping me off the streets for years.
People really need to appreciate sidewalks more
Who else kept you off the streets growing up?
I just want to give a quick shout-out to sidewalks.
Thanks for keeping me off the streets.
One day I was on vacation...
and I left the hotel to go grab dinner. I was walking along the sidewalk downtown and I see three people standing outside of an unmarked building. So, being the usual tourist, I go up to them and I ask them what they are waiting for.
One guy turns around and says, "Hey, this guy in the store...
A woman goes to a Porsche Dealership
A Woman goes to a Porsche Dealship to get a car
\-I need a car, said the woman
\-Of Course! what do you have in mind?
\-Looking for a convertible
\-Then you might be interested in the 911 GTS Cabrio
The price was very expensive but she still bought it