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Storefront Jokes

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A couple of guys open a new storefront

30 min later a nosey passer-by is peering through an open window trying to make out what’s going on..

He says, Hey what are you guys selling?

They respond .. We’re selling assholes…

He says.. business must be good, it looks like you only have two left…

Did you hear Elon Musk opened a storefront down at the mall?

"Space for Rent"

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A coffin crashes into the storefront of pharmacy

2 men were loading up a hearse with a coffin on a steep incline, after they loaded the cargo, they both get into the vehicle..As they start to pull away, the back door swings wide open and the coffin crashes to the ground and starts sliding down the incline, across the intersection, into the store f...

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Yankel the Jew is walking in town one day. He is walking by the stores, admiring all the storefronts and the products they offer.

Suddenly, he notices a peculiar sign on the window of a pet store: "Talking Parrot! Can have real conversations!"
He went inside and inquired about the parrot. As he was shown the parrot, the parrot squawks, "Hello, how are you! I'm rudolph!" In near perfect english and the parrot holds out his w...

What do Pavlov's dogs call storefront bell-ringers?

The Salivation Army.

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A guy traveling through a small town walks into the only bar. There’s one other patron in the entire place, already drunk. The drunk man stumbles over, wraps an arm around the traveler’s shoulder and begins to talk:

“Did you see that fence on your way in? I built that fence. Do they call me Fence-Builder Johnson? No...” He downs a shot of whiskey.
“Did you see that barn down the road? I built that barn. Do they call me Barn-Raiser Johnson? No...” He downs another shot of whiskey.
“Did you see those storef...

Guy walks into a watch store

A guy walks in front of a watch store in a Jewish neighborhood, then he notices a watch on display that he likes, so he decides to go in and buy it.



Client: Hi, I noticed a watch outside in your storefront that I'd like to buy right now.

Seller: Sorry Sir, we don't sell any wat...

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Two guys run their own business out of the same storefront, allowing them to split the rent. The first guy has a bagel shop in the morning hours. After he clears out the second guy runs a martial arts studio in the afternoon. But what do they call the shop? What name on the sign works for both?

Jew Dough

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(OC) A Hippie walks by a businessman...

A Hippie is walking by and sees a businessman looking over some construction that had been started on a plot of land. The Hippie is alarmed and exclaims "What are you doing?!"

The businessman responds by saying that this piece of land was bought by his company. The land was good and the found...

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Taxi ride (long-ish)

A passenger in a taxi leaned forward to ask the driver a question and tapped him on the shoulder. The driver screamed, lost control of the taxi, nearly hit a bus, drove up the curb and stoped inches from a massive glass storefront.

For a few moments everything was silent in the taxi and then ...

A Scotsman goes to London

One day, a Scotsman traveled to the big city. He was impressed by all of the shops, tall buildings, and the bustle of city life. At one point, he came upon a storefront with a sign that read:

-Shirts: ÂŁ3
-Trousers: ÂŁ5
-Suit Coats: ÂŁ10

"O'ch, that's a screaming good deal!" the Sc...

Two old soldiers are reflecting during a visit to the town where they grew up.

The first soldier had had both arms amputated at the elbow following after the war, and the second both legs at the knee.

After a while of gazing upon old buildings and storefronts, the men come across a statue in the town park; the statue shows signs of age and neglect.

The second rem...

A man is walking down the street...

...on his way home and decides to surprise his wife with flowers. He sees a storefront with the window overflowing with flowers and stops in. "I'll have a dozen roses," he says. The shopkeeper calmly shakes his head and says "I'm sorry, we don't sell flowers. We actually do circumcisions". The incre...

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A Night To Remember...

A man is walking through the city at night and sees a woman sitting at the storefront of a shop wrapped in a blanket with a sad look on her face.

He kneels down beside her and asks if she is okay.

“I’m fine, it’s just I have been sleeping rough for weeks, I’m freezing cold and haven’...

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