Roman Empire Jokes - 11 Hilarious Roman Empire Jokes

Why wasn't there any McDonald's in the Roman Empire

There was too much Greece

How do you cut the Roman Empire in half?

With a pair of Caesars!

How did the Roman Empire split into 2?

They used a pair of “caesars”
(I made this in my global class, if you guys don’t know what happened during the Roman Empire they were so big to control that they divided into two)
pls no bully me

64AD: Nero bans the practice of christianity through the roman empire

christians: i can’t believe this

romans: correct

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A joke as old as the roman Empire

This is so old I might as well tell it with two Roman centurions.

Two centurions are walking down a street in Rome one day. They come upon an alley where a dog is licking his dick.

"I wish I could do that," the first centurion says.

The second one says, "You'd better pet him fir...

What was the most popular book store in the Roman Empire?

Barnestantinoble

I used to wonder why my history teachers loved to teach about the Roman Empire so much. I think I get it now.

They both hated vandals and goths.

One day in August, Julius Caesar was standing on the balcony in his palace, watching the leaves drop silently from the trees.

He was witnessing….The Fall of the Roman Empire.

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The invention of sex

A Greek and Italian were sitting down one day debating who had the superior culture.

The Greek says, "We have the Parthenon"
The Italian says, "We have the Colosseum"
The Greek says "We had great Mathematicians"
The Italian says "We had the Roman Empire" and so on and so on and
Th...

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Greek vs Italian Culture

One day , two men, a Greek and an Italian were sitting in a coffee shop discussing who had the superior culture.

Over triple lattes the Greek says, "Well, we have the Parthenon."

Arching his eyebrows, the Italian replies, "We have the Coliseum."

The Greek retorts, "We Greeks ...

Roman Rollers

Back in the days of the Roman Empire, the famous Emperor Nero instituted a new game.

The players would take those little disks you set your glass on in order to protect the furniture, and see who could get the most distance rolling them across the floor.

They were the first roller coas...

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