What did the Senate say to Julius Caesar?

You’ve got a lot of Gaul!

What do French barbarians wear to protect their eyes?

Gaul-gles.

(Courtesy of my eight year old.)

Why was Julius Caesar the first dictator of Rome?

He was the only one with the Gaul to try it.

My girlfriend said I don't know how to be romantic

So I yelled "DEUS VULT!" and invaded Gaul. Proved her wrong

A centurion and his cohort walk into a bar...

The bartender sighs and says, "Lemme guess. You either want one martinus or you'll hold up two fingers in a V and ask for five."

The centurion stabbed him because the bartender was a Gaul.

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